


Emma Swan's Guide to Great Sex

by Exquisiteliltart



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Sex Toys, Sexual Content, Surprise Party, Swan Queen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-29
Updated: 2014-11-24
Packaged: 2018-02-19 05:18:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 41,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2376131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Exquisiteliltart/pseuds/Exquisiteliltart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma invites Regina to a party. **This work has been abandoned***</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Let's Have a Party

Ever since Granny started selling those crazy wraps that shrink stomach fat, home-based businesses had been all the rage in Storybrooke. In the post-curse market, people were looking for ways to make extra cash and in the past month Mary Margaret had attended two Pampered Chef parties, a Mary Kay party, Lia Sophia jewelry party and an Uncorked wine party.

  
She was partied out.

  
She sighed as she realized she had committed to three more random parties in the next few weeks, one of which Ruby was hosting and Emma was currently helping her plan. She’d definitely have to buy something at that one. She wrinkled her nose, and made her way from the kitchen around the corner into the living room catching part of their conversation as she passed by, and wearily rolled her eyes. This was worse than when the Lost Boys sold popcorn to fund raise for their new camp ground.

  
“Yeah, we can totally have the party at the Town Hall. That would be perfect,” Emma sipped her cocoa as Ruby scribbled notes. Catalogs and tiny sample packets were strewn all over Mary Margaret’s coffee table.

  
“Are you sure Regina won’t have a problem with us having it there?” Ruby asked leaning forward to read Emma’s expression. It was the nature of the party Ruby was worried about: a sex toy party, or as her consultant hand book read, ‘an intimate relationship helping party.’

  
“Nah, I’ll invite her to come along. She loves being invited to parties, and if I didn’t invite her and she found out about it she’d be pissed anyhow…” Emma looked off into the distance as if remembering something very unpleasant. She frowned a bit harder as her mind’s eye pictured Regina at a sex toy party.

  
“Ok, as long as she isn’t all dark and sulky, slinking around making all of our other guests feel nervous. Emma, you’re in charge of her.” Ruby lowered her head to meet Emma’s eyes and catch her attention, which seemed to have drifted.

  
“How am I supposed to be in charge of Regina?” Emma snapped out of her daydream and scoffed. She glanced sideways at Ruby, distractedly brushing imaginary dirt off the sleeve of her shirt, but smirked slightly at the notion.

  
“I’m sure you’ll find a way,” her voice laced with innuendo, but when she realized Emma was still pouting, she quickly said, “You know, just make sure she has a good time, and above all else, make sure she’s happy.”

  
“As if, that’ll be the day,” Emma frowned again, shaking her head, and amended her statement feeling a bit guilty. “You know, she really has changed, and she isn’t half bad to hang out with when she’s not trying to control everyone. When I visit Henry, sometimes Regina and I actually have fun.”

  
Ruby shrugged, laughing to herself at how oblivious Emma seemed to be about her feelings towards Regina, and refolded her legs. She leaned forward, resting her arms on her thighs, and changed the subject to spare her embarrassment, “Ok, now that we have the location settled, what should have for refreshments?”

  
She perked up, and immediately said, “Tacos!”

  
…

  
Emma had been dreading inviting Regina to the party for days. She had debated on just mailing her an invitation, or sending an email, but she ultimately decided she had better invite her in person. There was no reason to be this worried. It was just a party, but it was also a sex toy party. As professional as Ruby had promised she would be, and she had promised she wouldn’t make any inappropriate comments about Emma and Regina wanting to get it on. She clenched and unclenched her gloved hands as she made her way up the path to the Mayor’s home.

  
She knocked firmly, realizing just a little too late that her cheeks were already flushed from nervousness. After a minute, she heard footsteps and then the door opened up a bit, and Regina regarded her with a raised eyebrow before pulling the door open wider.

  
“Hey,” Emma greeted her with a nervous exhale. Regina gave her the once over and smiled slightly.

  
“To what do I owe a pleasure of an unannounced visit?” Regina’s voice was flat per usual, and she turned promptly on her heel making her way back inside, knowing that Emma would follow closely.

  
She did just that as they stood just inside the door at an awkward distance from one another. Emma looked around and furrowed her brow, “I wanted to invite you to a party. It’s called a Surprise party.”

  
“I’m familiar with the concept. Who are we surprising?” Regina asked, genuinely intrigued. She crossed her arms over her chest and cocked her head to the right and let her eyes scan over Emma’s arms and down her torso. She was wearing her black leather jacket. Regina preferred it to the red one and she appraised her almost approvingly.

  
“No one… it’s not that kind of surprise. It’s…Ruby’s hosting it, and we’re having it at the town hall,” Emma knew she sound flustered, and Regina’s tolerance was being tested with every passing moment that she didn’t get to the gist of it.

  
“I’m sure Henry will be delighted,” Regina nodded patiently, still wondering what who exactly this party was in honor of.

  
Emma had been dwelling on just how to invite her, but hadn’t taken the time to think through exactly how to explain the type of party Ruby was hosting. She couldn’t say the words “sex toys” to Regina. Even if she tried to spit it out, her mouth just wouldn’t form the words.

  
“Well, it’s for adults only, so Henry can’t come,” Emma cleared her throat when Regina’s polite smile faded into puzzlement. “Sometimes it’s called a Passion party.”

  
“Oh?”

  
“Yeah, so anyhow … it’s this Saturday, and it’s at the town hall. All women coming,” Emma mumbled out the logistics, and handed Regina the invitation that Ruby had printed up.

  
She regarded it curiously as there was a bright pair of pink lips stamped on each corner of the placard. There wasn’t much in the way of details, just the time and place, and under ‘what to bring’ it said, ‘an open mind.’

  
“I’m making tacos for it, and there will be punch,” Emma smiled finally, feeling relived that the hard part seemed to be over.

  
“I’ll see you there,” Regina folded her arms across her chest again and rocked on her heels. A moment of silence passed between them.

  
“Is that all you came for, then?” She didn’t mean to sound disappointed. She was happy to be invited, but she should have known better than that Emma would just stop over for a social call. She shouldn’t have even wanted her to, but sometimes when they had plans involving Henry, they actually had nice talks. Regina usually enjoyed making people nervous and keeping them on edge, but Emma seemed off today.

  
“Oh, right, yeah. That’s it. Just want you to come to the party. Should be fun,” Emma laughed and smacked her lips before turning to head out the door.

  
When the front door clicked shut, Regina started up the stairs yelling, “Henry, I need you to use the Google and look something up.”

  
….

  
“I think it’s a sex thing…” Henry turned bright red as Regina stood over his shoulder in front of the computer.

  
“Sex thing?”

  
She leaned in to get a better look at the screen. First she saw a bunch of women smiling brightly, and then her jaw dropped when Henry clicked the ‘shop’ button and she saw the array of lingerie and phallic shaped items on the web page for “Passion parties.”

  
“What the hell? Henry, turn it off. I’ve seen enough,” Regina stammered. Her eyes briefly met his as he turned in his chair. He couldn’t oblige fast enough, as he clicked the mouse over the X and the page closed.

  
They both exhaled in relief as Regina made a beeline for the door. She stopped in her tracks, her mind racing, “Henry, what do you know about sex, anyhow?”  
“Uh, Mom, I know what sex is… Emma told me how everything works.”

  
“Oh, um… good. Good,” Regina’s head bobbed clumsily and her hair fell in front of her face as she practically stumbled out of the room, making her first graceless exit ever.

  
…

  
In the relative safety of her study her mind raced. She went back and forth between relief and anger. Albeit, she did not want to be the one to inform Henry about sex, but she had planned to get him a book about it when he was at the right age. Though, she had no idea what age was the right one. In a way, she was grateful that Emma had stepped in and performed that parental duty, but she didn’t exactly trust that she had done an adequate job.

  
Then there was the matter of this party…surprising passion… that was going to be hosted by the sex-popsicle herself, Ruby, and wholly attended by women. Regina knew that when the curse had ended and time was no longer frozen, the people of Storybrooke had advanced with modern society rather quickly, and become well integrated with pop culture. She shuddered as she remembered a particular Miley Cyrus performance she had seen when flipping through the channels one night.

  
Maybe she had better give Henry another sex talk, just to make sure Emma had covered all the bases. She brushed her hair out of her eyes and poured herself a tall glass of cider. Where to start? She couldn’t exactly give Henry the same talk Cora had given her when she was teen:

  
_“You don’t have ‘sex’ dear, that is what lowly peasants do. You are a lady and you shall ‘make lurve.”_   
_“Yes, with my true love!” Regina had beamed at the very idea._   
_“No, not necessarily. Love is weakness, but men, well, men expect you to show vulnerability in the bedroom. But you do it all the while keeping in mind that you are enabling yourself to get the thing that really matters.”_   
_“A baby?” Regina had asked, hopeful._   
_Cora had laughed wryly, “No, my foolish girl. Power. And yes, if a baby would help achieve that end, then that’s what you should do.”_

  
For all her Evil Queen-ness, the truth was that Regina was relatively old fashioned when it came down to it. Being invited to some sort of lesbian orgy by Emma repulsed and intrigued her all at once. She debated whether or not to even attend, but she knew as the last drop of cider trickled down her throat she would be going to that party. And if for other reason than to speak to Emma about exactly what she had told her son about sex.


	2. Party Time

The final decorations had just been set up: pastel streamers and balloons lined the walls of town hall. The taco bar was hot and ready, and Emma had just finished adding the sherbet to the punch. Guests were starting to arrive in some groups, and chairs were sat out in a big circle in the middle of the open room.

  
“No sign of Regina yet,” Ruby sidled up to Emma near the punch bowl, where she had obviously raised her head whenever the door opened and someone new came in.

  
“She’ll be here, I’m sure. She seemed excited about it,” Emma smiled, and Ruby gave her a look. She toned it down a notch, “So what if she doesn’t come? Oh well.”

  
Ruby just patted her arm softly and gave her a look of pity as if to say, ‘right now, you look hornier than I do on a full moon at high tide.’

  
…

  
Regina sat in her parked car in the parking lot of town hall watching the festive balloons, which had been tied outside, bob and wave in the breeze. It was her preference to arrive slightly late, though she never technically was. There was no need to be nervous, but even still she gripped her steering wheel tightly and felt her heart beat a little faster. She just didn’t know what to expect. If anyone asked her to squat over a hand mirror and inspect her delicate lady petals she was going to ‘peace out’ in a cloud of purple smoke.

  
Opening the car door, and stepping gingerly out into the lot, she regained her composure and strode confidently through the door. She expected gasps and angry shouts of ‘who invited her?’ but this time, barely anyone stopped their conversation when she entered. She didn’t know whether to be pleased or offended as she was used to getting a reaction. Though only one reaction really mattered, and that was Emma’s.

  
“Okay, everyone we’re about to start so please take your seats,” Ruby announced clapping her hands together as she strode up to the table at the front of the circle of chairs. She started passing out clipboards and pens to those who were sitting down.

  
Regina took off her coat and scanned the room, instantly spotting Emma who was staring at her from over by the punch bowl. She waved slightly and motioned for Regina to come sit. They walked toward each other and took the last two open seats.

  
“Hey, you made it,” Emma whispered as Regina nodded affirmatively and crossed her legs. They both turned their attention to the front where Ruby was starting the presentation.

  
“So you’re all probably wondering what exactly this party is all about. Well, I thought it was about time that all of the ladies of Storybrooke take their intimate relationships to a whole new level. If you look at the clip board in front of you there is a wish list. So as we go through the products just make a check mark on the ones that you are interested in purchasing.”

  
She came over and handed out clipboards to Regina and Emma, giving Emma a wink as she passed by. Regina noticed and her brow furrowed in confusion. As she had confirmed, this was a sex party, but it wasn’t as wild or frightening as she had originally feared. What kind of sex party features clipboards? What a disappointment. Not that she had planned in participating in any overtly sexual activities anyhow.

  
Regina knew as well as anyone in the town that under the curse no one had really lived. They had survived of course, but she was just as ready to live and find her happy ending as everyone else. It seemed as though most already had, she looked around the room full of princesses who had been paired up with their true loves as the happy endings had returned. She felt bile rise in her throat, as she watched Snow listen to Ruby and gently rock her new little bundle of joy. Her gaze rested back to the Sheriff who was fervently chewing on the cap of her pen and concentrating hard as she read down the list of merchandise on the wish list.

  
“Ok, as an ice breaker, we’re all going to go around the room and tell one celebrity who you would do upside down and sideways…. And because I know it’s hard to choose just one- If you want to say a guy and a girl you totally can,” Ruby’s eyes were wide as she smiled in excitement, eager to hear about everyone’s celebrity crush.

  
Well, she was, that is right until Granny piped up from the right side of the room, “I’ll start: my guy would be Shemar Moore and my lady crush is Julianne Moore. What I can I say? I want Moore.”

  
“Eww, okay…I would pick Dwayne Johnson aka: The Rock, and Michelle Rodriguez. Belle, who would you pick?” Ruby pointed to Belle who was sitting quietly, taking it all in.

  
“Me? Well, of course, I’m very happy with what I have… but if I had to pick, I’d say Christian Grey from ’50 Shades of Grey.’ What a wonderful novel!”

  
“Hey, he’s a fictional character, it’s supposed to be a celebrity crush,” Granny chimed back in, “…Cause I would have picked him too.”

  
“Not to get all Meta, but are we really going to debate fictional characters versus actual celebrities? I mean aren’t we all non-fictional, fictional characters?” Cinderella shouted over the group, who had begun to fight in a low roar.

  
“Don’t shoot down my crush!” Belle said in a voice above the crowd.

  
“Ok, everybody, this is just supposed to be fun, so pick whoever you want,” Ruby threw her hands up to maintain order. There was nothing worse than a room full of agitated princesses arguing over their crushes.

  
“I’ll go,” a hush fell over the room as Regina spoke. She uncrossed her legs and as if in deep thought she said, “I’d say Angelia Jolie. She’s not only beautiful, but she’s also an adoptive mom. I admire that.”

  
“Regina, it’s not about who you admire. It’s about who you want to bang up and down and all around until the dwarves come home from the mines,” Granny reminded helpfully, gesturing a hip thrust to drive the point home.

  
At that prompt, Regina said, “Emma…” and everyone in the room gave a collective nod of ‘I told you so’ to the person next to them, but then Regina burst the bubble and continued to speak, “…what was the name of that character in that movie we watched together last weekend after Henry went to bed? ‘Devil likes Gucci’?”

  
“Ah, you mean Miranda Priestly from ‘Devil Wears Prada’. Yeah, you did seem to admire her as well.”

  
The two women shared a grin, and then looked away from each other, suddenly shy. Then Emma took her turn, “I don’t know why, but I just love Tina Fey… maybe it’s because she makes me laugh. Ooh, and you know who is so gorgeous? Jamie Murray, oh, and Eva Mendes, I just love dark hair and dark eyes-“

  
Granny was getting impatient and cut Emma off before she kept spouting off her whole list of actresses that seemed to tick all her boxes, “How about some men? Doesn’t anybody like men anymore?”

  
“Ooh, I like men!” Snow perked up, eager to shift the conversation away from having to hear who her daughter wanted to have sex with. “How about JFK? He’s all man.”

  
“He’s dead, so you probably don’t have a chance with him. Hate to burst your bubble, though,” Granny shouted out. She was on a roll.

  
“Fine, if I have to pick someone living (which is unfair) I’d pick Bill Paxton. There.”

  
The other guests shared their crushes without so much fanfare. Notably, Ariel apparently wanted all of the men from the show ‘Trueblood’, and Aurora also liked ‘Trueblood’ but was equal parts turned on/repulsed by Vampire Pam. But above all, she wanted that sweet hottie: Lucy Liu.

  
Emma found herself loosening up and relaxing, as she became more assured that Regina was having fun. She even moved her chair a bit closer so she could hear Regina better when she would occasionally lean to the side and whisper snarky comments about Rumple and Belle to her. Emma kept trying to hold in her laughter, and then she got embarrassed when she caught herself staring at Regina, who was looking all haughty and proud over a joke she had just made. Regina turned her head toward her, still smiling, and when she saw the expression in Emma’s eyes, her lips parted faintly.

  
Emma felt like she couldn’t breathe, her mouth quickly went dry and it was just the way that Regina was looking at her. It was so perfect…and she looked so gorgeous (almost like Jamie Murray or Eva Mendes) and just when she thought she should tell her how beautiful she looked a big plastic dong was shoved unceremoniously right in between their faces, shattering the moment. Regina nearly went cross eyed looking at it horror, and Emma sat back in her chair, exhaling the breath that had been stuck in her lungs, and feeling disappointed.

  
The product showcasing portion of the party had begun.

  
“This, my friends, is a dildo…”


	3. Tacos

“This, my friends, is a dildo… it is 8 inches long, and 3 inches in diameter…” Ruby explained the logistics of several different toys as professionally as she could manage while fondling dildos.

  
She even came around to each guest to demonstrate the multi-speeds on the various vibrators, which it turns out the second best way to test a vibrator is to place the vibrating part on the nose.

  
The Mayor jerked her head back when Ruby came at her face with the _Hola!Pussy_ vibrator- (which was a knock off of the _Hello!Kitty_ franchise.)

  
“You have to feel the different speeds. How are you going to know if you’d like it?”

  
“Come on, Regina, this is the fun part,” Emma snatched the toy and turned it all the way up. She touched it to the tip of her own nose and promptly sneezed.

  
“Looks like it works- it gave your nose an orgasm,” Regina smirked, her eyes twinkling.

  
“Yep, I guess I’ll have to buy it along with some Flonase to lube up my sinuses,” Emma joked back, and said ‘bop!’ in a high voice, as she pushed the vibrator onto Regina’s nose. The buzz was very intense. Regina wiggled her nose adorably, her lips pursing, as it caused her to sneeze too.

  
“We should definitely buy it!” Emma said, caught up in the moment, her laugh cut off as she realized she had said ‘we.’

  
“We?” Regina’s eyebrow arched so high that it looked like it was trying to crawl up her forehead. She scooted her chair over a few inches to gain some distance from the blonde. She felt the hairs on the back of her neck go up even while the low grade pulse of arousal in the pit of her stomach became harder to ignore. The implication was that she and Emma were to enjoy vibrator together.

  
“We, me, you… buy two...I just meant that it… it’s a nice buzz,” Emma stammered, her face instantly flushing impossibly red, as her body reacted to the insinuation, just as Regina’s had.

  
“You should definitely buy it. If you like it on your nose, think what it will feel like on your clit,” Ruby came around again, giving a suggestive look, trying to break up the awkwardness between the Mayor and the Sheriff. She had fully anticipated this happening, and she didn’t want either woman to feel uncomfortable. She glanced nervously, back and forth: Regina sulking and Emma had her arms crossed like a pouting child while she gazed across the room at the clock on the wall.

  
“Okay, it’s time for a break before we start the massage oil and flavored lube demonstration,” Ruby cleared her throat as she walked back to the front of the room, holding tightly to the still merrily buzzing vibes in her hands. “Who is ready for some tasty tacos?”

  
Everyone mumbled excitedly as they got up to get some food. Regina remained in her seat, pulling out her phone to act like she was busy concentrating on work. Emma approached her, holding a plate. She was less flushed, and had regained her composure. She was nervous because she was afraid that she had ruined the pleasant rapport they had been engaged in.

  
“Hey, Regina, I didn’t mean anything by what I said. We were just having fun,” Emma offered the proverbial peace offering: her tacos.

  
Regina glanced up, seemingly nonplussed, she kept her features neutral as to not betray exactly how touched she was that Emma fixed her a plate of food. Usually, Regina seemed to be the one always serving up lasagna or making apple turnovers for everyone else. She accepted the food with a nod and sat it on her lap. The tacos looked pretty good, and there was even a generous squirt of hot sauce. How sweet of Emma to remember that the Mayor liked her meat spicy.

  
Emma sat back down next to her, holding her own plate of tacos, which were piled up with cheese and sour cream. The two women sat in silence, eating and contemplating their own thoughts.

  
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something that Henry mentioned to me,” Regina broke the silence, sat up straight in her chair, and wiped her mouth with a napkin.

  
“What’s that?” Emma asked with her mouth full of food.

  
“He said you talked to him about sex. I need to know what you educated him about.”

  
Emma swallowed thickly lest she spit out her tacos. Her eyes got wide, “Oh yeah, well, he was clueless and I just wanted to make sure he knew the in and outs of it.”

  
“I see.”

  
“I’m sorry. I should have discussed it with you first…”

  
“Sex? You should have discussed it with me?” Regina asked. Her face lit with sly amusement. Ah, how she did love watching Emma squirm.

  
“Well, yes… the topic just came up, and he was… curious,” Emma took another bite of her taco, as she blushed again. She figured it was best if she had something to chew on with the way Regina was looking at her.

  
Emma rubbed her hands across her thighs, effectively wiping the grease off, and braced herself for Regina to start yelling that Henry was too young, or she that it wasn’t her place to inform him of the birds and the bees, but the tongue lashing never came.

  
“Thank you, Emma. I wasn’t sure how to broach the subject with him, and he seemed to take it well,” Regina smiled warmly, which was quite a shock.  
“You mean you’re not mad at me for telling him?” Emma gulped again.

  
There was a pause, while Regina thought about how much to share. She kept her walls up and her emotions guarded and even admitting that she was relieved that Emma had spoken to her son, was a lot.

  
“As long as you spoke about such an adult matter tastefully and with maturity, I am fine with it,” she finally said decidedly, rising from her seat and offering her hand to collect Emma’s empty plate. She still wanted to know what exactly Emma had told him, but she would save that line of questioning for a less public setting.

  
“Everybody get ready we have some more treats in store!” Ruby announced holding up a tube of something that looked gooey and some sort of candle. “Also, I just want to remind everyone that if you would like to place an order, I will go over the process with you individually in private so there’s no need to be shy. Now get your wish list ready because whatever you wish to buy will be completely confidential.”

  
“Let’s see the lube!” Granny yelled, rubbing her hands together in anticipation. “Sometimes my muffin needs a little butter, if you know what I mean.”

  
“Oh my God, okay… we have several types of silky smooth lubricants that are gel based, and flavored. If you all put your finger out, I’ll come around and put a little bit on so you can taste it and feel just how smooth it is.” Ruby said, as she came around the circle offering a drop of lube to each lady.

  
“Mmm, tastes minty, and it’s not greasy at all,” Snow appraised the properties of the lube excitedly.

  
“Yeah, it’s soft as silk. Ooh, this is lovely,” Aurora commented, licking her finger.

  
Apparently, it wasn’t that soft because when Ruby came around to Regina and Emma there was an air bubble or clog in the tube and while Ruby meant to squeeze only a small dab onto Regina’s index finger, she squeezed a bit too hard and a huge glob of lube landed on Regina’s chest. Emma reacted instinctively and tried to shield her from it, but only ended up getting some of the minty lube on her neck too as she crashed into the brunette landing on top of her.

  
“Whoa! The sheriff is really committed to her job, looked like she was about to take a bullet for her!” Granny chortled, while everyone laughed.

  
“The bullet is another fun vibrator that you can purchase on page 27 of the catalogue,” Belle added, helpfully holding up the booklet.

  
“Regina, are you okay?” Emma finally came to her senses as she felt the dollop of lube slowly dripping down her neck. And looked down just in time to watch it dribble off of her chest and land in Regina’s cleavage.

  
“Get me off, Emma, I mean get off of me…” Regina tried to stand up, as Emma sort of slowly slid off of her just like the lube.

  
“Sorry, that was not part of the demonstration, but as you can see the lube can safely be used on any part of the body, and as we know it’s quite tasty so it can be licked off any part of the body,” Ruby smiled mischievously, also pointing out that as a water based lube it won’t stain clothing.

  
“You two better get yourselves cleaned up before the massage oil comes out,” Granny pointed them toward the bathroom.

  
Regina pushed Emma away and grimaced as her eyes followed the trail of clear lube that was soaking into her bra, and stomped off toward the bathroom. Emma hung her head and followed closely behind her.


	4. Pheromones

Regina allowed Emma into the bathroom and angrily slammed the door behind them to shut out the sound of everyone tittering like schoolgirls. She turned to face the blonde and promptly gave her a not so light shove into the wall, noting with satisfaction when Emma’s breathing rate seemed to increase automatically.

  
“What were you thinking, you idiot?” Regina hissed while leaning her shoulder into her chest while the blonde’s eyes grew wide.

  
“I was trying to protect you from that lube!” Emma shouted waving her arms, spitting out, “I thought you’d be grateful.”

  
“Hush, keep your voice down. Do you want them all to hear us? How very noble of you, Savior, but I think I can handle a dollop of liquid without you intervening.”

  
The brunette hip checked her as she made her way to the sink to inspect the damage. The lube had all but absorbed and disappeared, but Regina made a big show of wetting a paper towel and dabbing it at her skin.

  
“Whatever. I thought this would be nice, but you’ve been weird since the party started,” their eyes met in the mirror as Regina abruptly looked up at the woman standing behind her.

  
“Maybe that’s because half the town is here and they keep watching you fawning over me. I know we’re friends now, but I’m not an invalid. I get can my own damn plate of tacos. Now they all think…”

  
“What do they all think?” Emma sidled up beside her, very interested to know where Regina’s feeling lie.

  
“Nothing, I’m sure they don’t think,” came her terse reply.

  
“Knock, knock? Everything alright with you two, we heard shouting,” Belle asked from the other side o the door. The others were busy making bets if the women were going to fight in there or fuck. It had been loud, and then it got very quiet and people just assumed magic was happening behind that closed door.

  
“Everything is fine!” Emma shouted, “Just keep the party going. We’ll be out in a minute.”

  
“Hurry up; you’re going to miss the next product!” Ruby shouted, her voice sounding a bit farther away.

  
Emma looked down at the spot of lubricant, shiny on her flushed chest and frowned. She rubbed it in to try and spread it out, and caught sight of Regina staring at her in the mirror.

  
“Now tell me what you told Henry about sex. I need to know if I need to extend his therapy sessions with Dr. Hopper,” Regina’s voice was acid, all tones of friendliness vanished.

  
“We had better get out there soon, if you’re so worried about what they all think…” the blonde tried to delay the inevitable.

  
“You said you’d tell me when we were in private, and I think this qualifies,” Regina turned to face her, hands on hips, and eyes wandering to the shiny soft patch on her exposed chest.

  
The blonde licked her lips in frustration, sighing heavily as she cast her eyes downward and spoke rapidly, “Okay, I told him that his body will go through some changes, and part of that will be finding other people attractive. Sometimes when a man finds a woman attractive his penis will get hard, and sometimes it will just happen like in the middle of the night. Then I mentioned ejaculation, and how when a man puts his penis inside a woman’s vagina and ejaculates that’s how babies are conceived. It was all very technical.”

  
“Did you mention true love in any of this? I don’t want our some thinking he can conceive a child with just any woman he finds attractive,” Regina huffed and raised her arms, trying to think of more points to argue, but failing.

  
“Well, he did ask some questions about love or whatever, but Henry said he doesn’t even find any girls attractive right now, so I don’t think we have to worry about him impregnating anyone yet,” Emma rolled her eyes, noting she felt more embarrassed discussing this topic with Regina than she had with Henry.

  
“What did he ask?” Regina’s voice changed to a softer tone as she thought of Henry.

  
“Well, you’ve been reading him stories about fairytales and true love since he was a baby so he believes that everyone should be with their true love, and he asked about me and he asked about you and who our true loves could be,” Emma’s hands were sweating profusely and she couldn’t meet Regina’s eyes.

  
“Why did he ask about you and me? Didn’t he ask about your boyfriend, Hook?” Regina took note of Emma’s unmistakable reaction. She wasn’t telling her the whole story.

  
“Look, its ridiculous…” Emma didn’t want to say anything to piss Regina off, and she didn’t even know how this had all come up with Henry, “but the kid thinks…well, he has this romantic notion that you, the Evil Queen and me, the Savior, should be each other’s true loves.”

  
“Does he?”

  
“He probably just wants both his moms together, it’s totally normal for a kid to want that, but I assured him that you and I are friends, and we’re going to stay that way, right?” Emma gave a weak smile and her question went unanswered. Regina simply rolled her eyes and opened the door to step back into the main room.

  
“You guys were in there forever, we tried to delay as long as we could, but some of us are anxious to get home and try out these products in private,” Ariel commented, crossing her arms and slinking down into her chair. “Some of us haven’t had a vagina for very long and this is all very new.”

 

“Yeah, and some of us don’t have that much time left with their vaginas. Here, here! Plus, some of you couldn’t even wait to get home…” Granny added, as they all turned in their seats to watch a very scattered looking Sheriff exit the bathroom and meekly take her seat next to Regina.

  
“Thanks for rejoining us, ladies. We were just about to try out this pheromone perfume. Now, pheromones are external hormones that we all give off that send signals to those around us. There are different kinds of pheromones for instance, when a dog marks its territory that is a pheromone of the repellant kind. Or to help a baby bond with its mother, the mother’s milk and skin secrete pheromones," she looked a Snow with baby Neal and smiled sweetly.

  
“But most importantly, when a woman is particularly fertile she gives off pheromones that make her more sexually appealing.” Ruby walked around spritzing each guest’s wrist. “This is a light clean scent and I can totally vouch that it works because on days I wear this while waitressing my tips are almost double- it’s more effective than a push up bra and red booty shorts. Swear.”

  
“Easy,” Emma grumbled as Ruby doused her in a cloud of pheromone mist. She walked toward Regina who held up her hand in protest, but she got spritzed anyway.

  
“Oh no,” Regina whispered wearily as her eyes dilated in a purple ring, and an aura of purple magic mist extended from the margins of her body.

  
“What’s wrong?” Emma asked in confusion. Everyone in the room gasped as they looked at Emma and Regina, who were both letting off a hazy purple glow.

  
“Emma, your eyes…” Aurora pointed to her own eyes, her mouth open in astonishment.

  
“Pheromones are particularly concentrated in women who have magic. Adding more is like throwing gasoline on a fire. It intensifies everything,” Regina explained, her eyes ringed with a disturbing violet.

  
“You guys, I feel fine… and I smell great, so what is the problem?” Emma shrugged and started to turn in her seat to look at Regina, and then she froze in place and gazed at Regina, “Wow, you’re so…”

  
A window shattered breaking Emma’s lust-driven stare.

  
“We need to get away from each other,” Regina said with a lump of panic forming in her throat, “before we destroy the town.” She jumped out of her seat and grabbed her coat making haste towards the door.

  
Emma sort of stumbled out after her, “Regina! Wait, don’t leave. Come back!”

  
Granny clapped her hands in delight, “Damn, Emma is like Pepé Le Pew chasing his la belle femme skunk fatale through the streets of Paris in the springtime.”

  
“Someone should go after them. They might be a danger to themselves or others,” Belle suggested worriedly, rising from her chair.

  
“Let them go. I’d rather they be a danger to themselves than me. I mean, someone is going to have to clean up that glass already,” Granny waved her hand dismissively. “Rubes, stop messing around and tell us about the kegel balls.”


	5. The lawn

Regina tried to make a run for it, but everything in her being was screaming at her to turn around and go to Emma. She couldn’t. She was strong and she could fight against the magnetic sexual attraction of some measly pumped up super pheromones. It was just magic induced, but magic could be very real and very dangerous. The same thing had happened when she had sniffed the spell book, and she managed to make it through that frustrating time. Of course, Emma had been sucked into a portal and wasn’t around back then…   
Who was she kidding? She wasn’t going to beat this feeling or wish it away and what’s more is that she didn’t want to. She stopped running in her heels and slammed her back against the town hall building. She turned her head away as if in pain, waiting for the inevitable. She attempted to control her heavy breathing as her body shook like a leaf. Everything was aching, but not in a painful way…it was quite pleasant and the closer the Sheriff came the more she felt it.  
Emma felt like she was losing her mind. She wanted to crawl out of her body. It was like she’d been hit by a freight train but she was still moving. She found herself right on Regina’s heels: a whirl of leather and haze. She crashed hard into the stationary brunette, knocking the breath from both of their lungs. Then she sort of nuzzled into her, and moaned in contentment. Regina made a sound that was less of a moan and more akin to a keening screech.  
Then all bets were off… but not for long.  
…  
“Is it just me or does the air feel charged somehow? It’s really stuffy. Whoo!” Granny waved away a remaining cloud of thin purple sexy mist and coughed lightly for dramatic effect.   
“Smells yummy, like apples and cinnamon,” Cinderella said, taking in a deep breath.   
“Save it for the Scentsy party, it’s next week,” Belle said. She was hosting that one.   
“That’s Regina and Emma for you,” Aurora rolled her eyes. She hadn’t even been in Storybrooke for long and she already knew what was up. “I bet they are ripping each other’s –“   
“Can we please stop?!” Snow interjected and shook her head. She had tried to be patient and sit through all of this sex stuff. Some of it she almost found fun, but when it came to her daughter and Regina, she wanted to see no, hear no and speak no.   
“Hey everyone, Mary Margaret is right, we’re not talking about them right now, we’re talking about anal beads and I need you all to focus on the topic at hand, or wherever… Anal beads can be very erotic, but you have to know how to handle them properly to prevent tearing and infection---what the hell was that?” Ruby stopped talking as she heard something that sounded like a dying cat in heat coming from the side of the building.   
All of the women jumped up from their seats and ran over to the shattered window to look out as their very own Sheriff and Mayor wrestled in the grass on the lawn of the town hall.  
“Bets are on! Are they fighting or are they… um? Hmmm.” Ariel cocked her head to the side to get a better view of the train wreck going on outside as the two women rolled back and forth on the lawn.  
“Oh, for the love of all that is good and holy!” Snow didn’t know whether to cover her own ears or the baby’s. She switched back and forth between both trying to block it all out to no avail. She could never tell Charming about this or he’d flip a gasket.   
Granny popped a kernel of popcorn in her mouth, never taking her eyes off of the cat fight, “This is the best party we’ve had yet! Ruby, you may want to get the hose ready.”   
“Hey, where did you get that popcorn?” Cinderella asked, looking at the buttery kernels and feeling jealous.  
“Always keep some in my purse. I have low blood sugar,” Granny offered her the bag, giving it a little shake, while her eyes never left the lawn; she took a handful and popped it in her mouth.   
“Bets are on! They are fighting! Look Regina is grabbing Emma’s hair!”   
“She only grabbed her hair so she could yank her face against hers. They are kissing! Yes, I knew it!” Aurora pointed in excitement.   
“No, no- they are tongue wrestling like they’re trying to make it an Olympic event- it’s still fighting.”   
“Yep, I say fighting- Emma just spanked her ass; she’s definitely punishing the Queen,” Ariel confirmed jumping up and down and fist pumping like it was the femme lesbian boxing championship and they were all spectators.   
“Darling, spanking isn’t always fighting, and some punishments aren’t about discipline,”  
Belle said giving a knowing look and put her glasses on as she looked on with interest. “I say they are making love…in a unique way that is all their own. I’ve never seen anything like this; I’ve only read about it…on the internet.”  
“Isn’t anyone going to go out and break it up?” Snow asked worriedly. Whatever Regina was doing with Emma she didn’t want her to get hurt, and it was looking rather rough. Though her daughter seemed to be smiling, no grinning from ear to ear.   
“I got it, I’ll go turn on the sprinklers,” Ruby pulled herself away from the action in search of the maintenance room.   
“I’m sure they are already wet, dear,” Granny whistled at her own innuendo and popped in another fistful of popcorn. “You like that seasoning? It’s nice and salty.”   
…  
Emma only saw in flashes: the purple haze, Regina’s soft brown hair, the green of the grass as they fell together. Everything else that transpired was less visual and much more tactile. She felt Regina’s expensive silk blouse brushing her face and the secure warmth of her body touching hers; it was heaven. As they started wrestling…Emma didn’t know what else to call it, it was like they were in a trance, and they couldn’t get enough of each other, but they were trying to repel one another at the same time. It was about then that she realized that Regina smelled like cinnamon and she smelled strongly of apples. Those magic pheromones are tricky bastards.   
There was a painful tug on her scalp and then soft lips brushing hers in the gentlest way possible. A breathy moan escaped her lips just before it was devoured fully. Emma relaxed into the kiss for a moment, feeling heat expanding throughout her body. Goosebumps rose on her arms, and Regina suddenly pulled away from her with loud delicious smack.   
“What the hell are you doing?” Regina’s lipstick was smeared across her cheeks, and she whacked at Emma clumsily and tried to scramble away. As if Emma was even the one to initiate the kissing portion of their little rendezvous. She was not going to take the blame. At least she was only going to take her fair share of the blame in these actions. She grabbed for the brunette’s waist and pulled Regina back down to the ground as a high heeled shoe went flying: legs dangling and kicking into the air. Then Regina clawed her thigh, and Emma retaliated by flipping her over and slapping her butt repeatedly.   
After that, things just got messier, they were rolling and unrolling, kissing and jabbing, it was amazingly hot and the rush Emma felt was indescribable. Then their heat was unceremoniously doused by very cold water coming from all angles. They sort of slowly untangled themselves, not able to look one another in the eye. They sat on the lawn as the water drenched through their clothes, and matted their hair.   
“Oh Girls, you two better get back up here and dry off before you catch cold!” Granny yelled down from the window. She turned back to Aurora and said, “God, get them inside before some children wander by and are scarred for life!”   
“Swan, we need to have a talk,” Regina grumbled breathlessly, she looked off into the distance, squinting into the sun.   
“A talk about…that?”   
“Indeed.”   
Emma stole a sideways glance at her, and sunk down in a heap when she realized that even for all that physical activity and being covered in grass stains, missing a shoe, lipstick smudged and soaking wet: that bitch still looked like cinnamon sex on a god damned stick.


	6. Hot

During the scuffle, Regina’s straining blouse buttons had popped off and her chest was now exposed, Emma noticed and couldn’t look away. Water droplets were streaming down the tendons of her neck. The curve of her breasts filled out the black satin of her bra, and practically spilled over the tops of the cups. It didn’t help that she was breathing heavily, and a red blush accentuated the delicious pulsing of her chest and abs. The sight made Emma swallow thickly and stare. She felt like she couldn’t breathe; she certainly couldn’t move. She held off her attempt to stand up entirely when she noticed the buds of Regina’s nipples standing in sharp relief against the soft satin. She felt dizzy in her desire to kiss her way down her neck and never stop.   
“What are you looking at?” Regina’s eyes trailed down to land on where Emma’s already were planted, and she scoffed noticing that she was showing some skin and pulled the sides of her shirt around her torso to cover up.   
Emma made a sound of frustration, “Sorry, about your shirt,” she muttered, not feeling sorry in any way shape or form.   
Pressing her hands into the wet grass behind her and bracing her feet, Emma picked herself up off of the lawn with a heavy sigh. She wiped her mud stained palms across the front of her jean clad thighs and offered a now semi clean hand to Regina, who swatted her hand away and then tried and failed to stand up, as she was wearing one high heel that had inconveniently staked itself into the ground. She was angry, embarrassed and anchored down in an awkward position.   
“Come on, let me help you,” the blonde tried again, this time ignoring her stone faced protest and pulling Regina up around the waist until both her feet were on the ground. Then Emma knelt before her and removed her foot from the cursed shoe, while Regina stabilized herself by putting a hand on the blonde’s shoulder.  
“My hero,” Regina sneered straightening her posture and retrieving the shoe from Emma’s proffered hand. Her thighs were burning from exertion, between them was burning hotter with unreleased tension. She was so uncomfortable, and every time Emma touched her it just heightened the feeling. Hell, just the way Emma had been looking at her was enough to make her feel hotter than a magic fire ball.  
“So uh, sorry things got out of hand, and we can definitely talk about whatever, but uh...I gotta go clean up my taco…tacos,” Emma deadpanned, sensing that the party was pretty much over. Truthfully, she needed to get home and get in the shower. Maybe if she just got a little breathing room between her and the Mayor she’d feel better. She wondered briefly if any of Ruby’s toys were water proof.   
As much as Regina did not want to go back into the building and face those peasants that had undoubtedly watched everything, she realized she had left her purse upstairs. Tempting as it was to poof herself home, she decided to hold on to her last scrap of dignity and go back inside. Also, she wanted to place an order.   
Emma lumbered back into town hall, and Snow rushed over immediately, “Are you okay? What happened? Everyone was saying some terrible things. You and Regina have got to stop fighting each other. No good ever comes of it.”   
“I’m fine. She’s fine, we’re both just…” Emma still didn’t know how to say ‘in hopeless lust with each other’ so she let the sentence trickle off into silence. She grabbed her chair and dragged it half way across the room as she couldn’t bear to sit next to Regina any longer.  
“Sorry about the pheromone spray, I didn’t know it was quite so strong. Hey, at least now spilling a little lube on each other doesn’t seem so bad anymore,” Ruby looked her up and down with a pitying expression. She had seen the look in Emma’s eyes before, it was a look she knew well- like having a bad itch that hadn’t been scratched to satisfaction.   
Ruby made her final announcement, “The party is finishing up, so everyone is welcome to play with any of the toys that were showcased today, and then bring your wish lists over to the office and I’d be happy to place your confidential orders.”   
“Christmas is coming early this year,” Granny said as she tipped her glasses to edge of her nose and excitedly checked off several boxes on her wish list.   
Regina emerged from the bathroom, looking back together, her hair even had a little flip at the ends, despite being dripping wet only a few minutes before. Except she was still holding her shirt together awkwardly, and her coat that she had planned on covering up with was covered in mud and saturated with water.   
Aurora watched Regina walk past, and leaned over to Belle to whisper just a little too loudly, “Someone should tell her that Emma isn’t one of the toys for sale.”   
Regina glared with violent intent and took a seat; she scanned the room spotting Emma over by the food table, looking like she was on a mission as she vigorously scrubbed out the roaster that the taco meat had been in.   
“Regina, I think I have something you could put on to cover up, since your shirt seems to have busted open,” Ruby smiled as Regina stood up, grabbed her wish list and wallet and followed Ruby back to the empty office she was using for the ordering.   
…  
“They have been in there for a really long time,” Emma muttered, jealousy unintentionally seeping through her words.   
“I’m sure Ruby is just helping Regina get dressed,” Aurora said, her eyebrow raised when she noticed how Emma clenched her jaw at that insinuation. “I think that taco plate is clean, you can stop assaulting it.”   
“It makes me feel better to do something with my hands,” Emma’s face was red from exertion, but she just kept scrubbing the pan.   
Just then Regina emerged from the back room wearing a baby blue corseted teddy with lace trim. Her boobs were sitting high and her waist was pulled in and laced up with ribbon. Everyone in the room stopped their conversations and stared. The only sound was the pleasant drone of a multi-speed vibrator that bell was playing with. Emma felt that feeling again, like a heat spreading out and up over her body and the dizziness returned. Her jaw hung open as she greedily drank in the sight of the Mayor in the tiny silk teddy. She still had her pants on, of course, and the lingerie wasn’t much more covering than her button-less shirt, but it was somehow even more appealing.   
Regina stopped her head turned and she met Emma’s eyes, a sly smirk graced her features, before she nodded to the rest of the room, and said, “Thank you for having me. Have a good day, everyone.”   
“Regina—“, Emma launched herself across the room as Regina started to walk out, and practically blocked her path.   
“Yes?” Regina blinked coolly and stood to face her while holding her purse in front of her with both hands as if she wasn’t wearing slinky bedroom attire out in the middle of the day.  
“I-um,” Emma wanted to ask if she would see her later or when they could get together and have a more in-depth discussion. Something anything to hang on to her for a bit longer and she didn’t even know why it mattered so much. In her head, she was screaming ‘just let the woman leave, geez.’  
“If you have nothing further, than ‘um’, I’ll be on my way, Ms. Swan,” Regina nodded her head and took a step toward her in an attempt to pass by.   
“Wait, um…do you want a plate of leftover tacos? I set the extra aside…” Emma was grasping.   
“I do believe I’ve had my fill of your tacos today, but thank you for the offer,” Regina swallowed, and rearranged her features into a mask of neutrality even as her eyes scanned Emma’s face. She looked particularly hurt that Regina didn’t want more tacos.   
“Oh, ok, thanks for coming…again sorry about, your shoes and your shirt…and my um…behavior,” Emma said the last bit quietly, her voice dripping with shame.   
“Thank you,” Regina responded in a flat tone, and headed toward the door, while Emma stood still, running over in her mind trying to figure out just why she felt so shitty. So much had been left unsaid, and even though Emma didn’t want to she knew if they talked they might be able to come to an understanding. At least she’d feel better about the whole situation. Her only job was to make sure Regina had a good time, and she was pretty sure she failed miserably, what with the mock WWF match outside. She sighed dejectedly as she watched Regina go.   
With the door half open, Regina turned back and hesitated a moment before opening her mouth and finally saying, as her eyes zigzagged down Emma’s body, “For the record, dear, your tacos were delicious, and just how I prefer mine: very hot.”   
Emma released the breath she didn’t know she had been holding. There was quite a lot on her mind, and she needed to do some thinking, but first she intended to find Ruby and ask her what exactly Regina had ordered.


	7. delivery

“Sorry, all orders are confidential, and I take this very seriously,” Ruby took a couple handfuls of dildos and stuffed them back into her overflowing brief case. They were just finishing cleaning up after the party, which was declared a smashing success by everyone in attendance, except perhaps Regina and Emma. Everyone else was rating on entertainment value alone, and it was at least, much better than the Demarle at Home cooking pots and pans party that Leroy had hosted the week before.   
“Seriously though, why can’t you just tell me what Regina ordered?” Emma realized she sounded whiny, but she didn’t care. She stopped to take a minute to ponder exactly why it mattered so much what Regina ordered, and true, it was her own private business and shouldn’t matter at all… but still.   
“If you are so worried about it, how about when her order comes in, I send you over to deliver it to her?” Ruby spun around and wiggled her eyebrows. “You can help carry it up to her bedroom.”   
“How do you know Regina’s bedroom is upstairs?” Emma asked, still suspicious of the amount of time Regina had spent in that back room with her.   
Ruby just shrugged and waved her hand as if to brush off Emma’s question, “Do you want to help me out or not? And really it’s helping you out, because that gives you an excuse to go over there and work out the tension between you two.”   
“Tension?”   
“Oh yeah, don’t play dumb, girl. You are walking a tight rope, and I suggest you work it out before she puts the lock down on Henry. Things were going good between you guys, and this is just the next step in your…bonding.”   
Emma’s brow creased as she folded up the chairs and stacked them back in order, “Yeah, things were going well, and I have to keep our relationship amicable because the only person it really hurts when we’re fighting is Henry.”   
“And Regina’s blouses,” Ruby added helpfully as they walked out the door.   
“You’re right about that. I suppose it would be a good gesture to deliver her order,” Emma pondered, seeing that Regina never mentioned any set time when they were to see each other again. Usually, after their joint Henry dinner or movie dates they always planned another, but they hadn’t done that for a couple weeks. It worried her that she cared so much.   
“Great, thanks a lot! I’ll call you when her packages arrive!” Ruby said as she waved goodbye.   
“Packages?” Emma asked dumbfounded.   
“As in multiple… you are going for multiples, yes?” Ruby was so proud of her little jokes. Emma just snickered and headed out.   
….  
Emma didn’t hear from Regina for the next three days, but on the third day she did hear from Ruby as the orders were in! As promised, she stopped by the diner to pick up Regina’s packages and deliver them to her. Three days had passed, but if possible Emma was even more on edge. She thought she would have calmed down a bit after the craziness of the party, but that hadn’t been the case.   
“Oh good, you drove the cruiser and not your bug!” Ruby was in the back room, which was stacked with pink boxes full of products. Emma nodded and raised an eyebrow she had truly underestimated the need for sex toys in Storybrooke. Ruby was gonna make a ton of cash.   
“Why?”   
“Trunk space, duh. That bug has a tiny trunk, and I think you’d have to make at least two trips,” Ruby’s eyes gleamed as she held back a giggle.   
“Wait? What?” Emma looked around the room, and noticed the stacks of boxes went practically to the ceiling.   
“You’re here to transport Regina’s order, right? Well, this is it.”   
“Did she order everything?”   
“Yes, the whole inventory, which is usually for people who are serious about starting as a representative. I mean it is a hell of deal: only $500 for almost $2000 worth of products,” Ruby was wearing her black rimmed reading glasses and checking items off of a clipboard.   
“Regina spent $500 on dildos? What the hell? Why would she need so many?”   
“Maybe she’s going to become a rep, I don’t know. And hey, it’s confidential, okay, so just take her the stuff please. Oh and Emma, they don’t call you the savior for nothing, am I right?” Ruby shrugged then winked and watched the blonde hoist as many boxes as she could carry out the door.   
…  
Regina’s phone rang and she answered it with a curt ‘hello.’ Ruby had been instructed by Regina to call as soon as Emma was on her way with the order, and the call came sooner than expected, but the past three days had felt like a long wait all the same.   
“And did it seem like it was her idea to bring them to me?” Regina asked hopefully. She had wanted Emma to deliver the toys, and that was one of her stipulations she made when placing the order. The answer from the other end of the phone line was an affirmative and Regina smiled like Christmas had come early.   
She had ordered the entire inventory for one, because she just didn’t know what she’d actually enjoy, as she was on a planned journey of self-discovery and it seemed like the best option. For two, she desperately wanted Emma to join her on that journey, rather one of joint-discovery, and this was the best opportunity she’d have to make her move. Of course, she hoped that the savior would step up and make some moves as well. Regina wanted to be seduced, as much she wanted to be the seducer.   
After their rather impassioned, though embarrassing pheromone fueled public display, there was really no point in trying to hide their feelings anymore, but there had to be an element of showmanship and wooing. Regina was old fashioned like that, and part of her still feared that she wouldn’t be adequate or experienced enough to please Emma, thus a third reason for the toys: something to distract them while engaging them all at once.   
…  
Packing them all into the car, proved to be no small feat and it took her about seven trips of carrying, and a lot of organizing to get everything to fit. She piled up the trunk and the backseat and even the front seat. She had to hold one extremely large and long shaped package on her lap as she drove. She was up to her eyeballs in sex toys.   
She debated calling Regina beforehand to make sure she was home, (and more importantly, that Henry was not,) but she really couldn’t get to her phone. She only hoped there was no town emergency while she was transporting because she didn’t think a high speed chase would be a good idea. Packages were already falling over when she hit the brakes just a little too hard.   
Emma pulled up to the driveway, relieved to see the Mercedes parked there. She scooted up as close as possible for to reduce the distance she’d have to carry everything. She finagled her way out of the cruiser and carried just the long box up the way to knock on the door.   
Regina answered almost immediately, typical smile planted firmly on her face, while she purred, “Sheriff, what a surprise. What can I do for you?”   
Something in her tone told Emma that she wasn’t surprised at all, “Ruby asked me to deliver your order from the party, so I brought everything over.”   
“Very good,” Regina rocked forward and back on her heels, her hands clasped behind her back. Emma held the first package in an awkward embrace while they locked eyes and lost track of the moment.   
“So is Henry here?” Emma finally broke the silence and attempted to peer into the living room for any sign of their son.   
“No, he is out at the stables for his after school sword practice and riding lessons with Charming. He’s not expected back any time soon,” Regina’s eyes followed Emma’s closely.   
“Erm… so where do you want all of your stuff?”   
“Why in my bedroom, of course.”


	8. Dishwasher Safe

“Sure, no…problem, I’ll just start carrying everything in,” Emma sensed something was amiss. Regina was acting suspicious, and she had plenty of experience recognizing that in the mayor even though she couldn’t put her finger on the exact reason. “Um…Regina, can I ask why you ordered all of this?”

  
“I support independent business woman like Ms. Lucas. Now, be a dear and bring in my things. I’ll make us a drink and supervise,” Regina’s voice didn’t betray anything, sounding like the perfect politician that she was.

  
Emma did the only thing she could do: carried boxes up to the bedroom. It had been a bitch lifting and carrying all of the boxes out of the diner, but for some reason it seemed a breeze to haul it into the Mayor’s bedroom. She did it in half the time, stacking packages on the bed and all over the floor. Regina’s room smelled amazing, which Emma sourced to the smattering of candles softly lighting the space, and if Emma didn’t know better she’d assume they were romantic. Maybe Regina had someone coming over later, and that was why she was so excited for her toy delivery. It was quite a thrill just to be in Regina’s inner sanctum.

  
Regina appeared at the doorway of her bedroom, holding two glasses of red wine. Swirling them softly to aerate as Emma looked over her handiwork. She pulled off her hoodie and stood in just her black tank, a glisten of sweat raking down her arms and highlighting her chest.

  
“I think I brought everything in, hopefully no leftovers under the seat,” Emma jammed her hands in the pockets of her jeans, and rocked forward, feeling like a bug under a magnifying glass in the sun.

  
“Is there somewhere you need to be getting to?” Regina asked softly, watching the woman in front of her closely, letting her eyes drift inconspicuously down her body.  
“No, not anywhere that I can think of, I’m off work. Unless, someone is coming over and you want me to go?” Emma’s heart beat a bit faster with the promise of spending more time with Regina. Not that she wanted to have any emotional talks or discuss Henry’s budding sexuality over an assortment of adult toys, but she was already here.

  
“No, don’t go. Good, then you could maybe help me unpack and inventory all of these things?”

  
“Me, unpack? Um, do you have space in your closet for all of this?”

  
“Actually, I might be clearing something out of the closet very soon,” Regina crossed the room making short distance between them, and stood obnoxiously close, meeting her eyes and smiling while handing Emma her glass of wine. “This cabernet is called ‘Feather’ it has a quietly powerful, yet beautiful flavor.”

  
Emma rolled her neck slightly and shouldered a bit closer, “If you’re attempting to ply me with alcohol, I have to warn you I respond better to cheese steak."

  
“We’ll see about that,” Regina murmured in a husky whisper that heightened all of Emma’s senses like only the seductive promise of a possible cheese steak could. “We better start unpacking; else we might be here all night. I thought this might give us the opportunity to have an honest conversation about a few issues we need to resolve. ”

  
“Uh, yeah, ok,” Emma felt a bead of sweat roll down her forehead, her hands seemed to be going numb. She took a sip of the quiet powerful beautiful wine and felt her throat tighten as it slid down. She felt exhilarated and frightened like the feeling she’d known back when she was a thief or about to take down a perp.

  
Part of the discretion when ordering from the passion party is that the products are shipped in non-descript boxes so that the neighbors or mailman don’t know you ordered super horny slut cream or what not. With the size of this order, everything was a mystery, and Emma felt like she was about to play Russian roulette. She did not want to be the one to open the biggest dildo.

  
“Sit,” Regina sat down in the one small open spot on the bed, the packages shifted and threatened to topple at the disturbance of her weight. She patted the tiny spot next to her.

  
Emma sat down tentatively, her thigh pressed against Regina’s as she balanced her wine in one hand. Again, the boxes shifted and a heavy one fell directly into her lap.

  
“I guess I’ll start with this,” Emma slid her fingernail through the light packing tape and opened the end of the box. She pulled out the bubble wrap and then shut her eyes as she reluctantly pulled out the first toy: a glass dildo with purple swirls. It looked like a unicorn horn.

  
“Fancy,” Regina commented with a smile and a low whistle. “Will you read the description, dear?”

  
“Oh god, alright, I guess so,” Emma couldn’t believe that she was serious. She felt put on the spot, and so was the toy apparently. She read the description on the back of the box: “This toy takes the work out of finding that elusive g-spot, and though it is made out of glass, don’t be scared. Clean up is a snap because it is dishwasher safe.”

  
“I will not be putting that in my dishwasher,” Regina laughed in disgust.

  
“Really? I thought that would appeal to your neat freak tendencies,” Emma laughed as she slid her hand around the glass dildo, and waved it up and down feeling its weight, “Pretty heavy.”

  
There was a long moment of silence before she felt Regina stiffen beside her, “Emma, what happened between us at the party- with the pheromones, I know that it was partially the magic that drove us to behave like that, but I think there was something else too.”

  
“I’m sorry, Regina. I don’t know what came over me, and I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. It’s embarrassing,” Emma blushed even more than she thought possible while fondling a glass dildo.

  
“Don’t be embarrassed, It’s hard for me to say this too,” Regina placed a hand on Emma’s thigh and turned to look her in the eye. “I need to tell you that when we were on the ground, I realized how I crave you- your touch. And I felt free like I hadn’t in a long, long time. I was almost surprised that my mother did not appear out of thin air to scold me and ruin it.”

  
Regina looked away then, her shoulders hunching a bit in sadness and shame. Emma sensed the change immediately, and tried to cheer her up, “No, it was my mother who got to watch all of that.”

  
“Indeed she did,” Regina snickered as her eyes twinkled merrily at the thought.

  
“I feel the same way, and I invited you to the party because I realized that I actually enjoy spending time with you, and I care about you,” Emma mumbled out the words. She rarely said such things and she hadn’t intended on saying it to Regina, but it was true. There was a caveat: “But I don't trust easily or often, I've learned that if you let yourself be hopeful that’s when someone will try to take advantage.”

  
When Regina spoke next she sounded so young and vulnerable, Emma could scarcely believe it was the same woman, “I've been the one to prey on that hope and crush it into despair. I used to see the world through a dirty and twisted lens. It was all about pleasing me, and getting what I wanted, but now I see clearly and I…I want to please you. Truly, I bought these things in hope of bringing you pleasure. We create magic together, and we can create love too.”

  
Emma heard the honesty and she was taken aback. She couldn’t believe that Regina had really purchased a truckload of sex toys for her benefit.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry to cut it off there. We’re getting deeper and dirtier, and I’ll update soon. Thanks for reading, reviewing and your patience. I’m having a lot of fun writing this and don’t want to rush it too much.


	9. Batteries

Even with that verbal admission, Emma felt her heart still beating, her lungs still breathing. She never thought Regina really felt like that, let alone would admit it. She looked around Regina’s bedroom, taking in all the classic items of seduction. She half expected that she had a bubble bath prepared in the master bath. How could she have been so dense? A truckload of sex toys screamed seduction.

  
“Open another,” Regina nudged her thigh and Emma grabbed another box. She opened the package quickly and pulled out another vibrator. This one was pink and silicone. She read the description, “With its tried and true design, this product is easy to use and has a multi speed push button on the bottom.”

  
Regina took it from her hand and pushed the button. Nothing happened. She found and muttered, “No batteries.”

  
“I think you have enough things that don’t need batteries to keep you entertained for awhile, but do you have any AAs?” Emma couldn’t believe she was asking. Everything seemed all too real currently, and bringing those toys to life with a vibrant buzz would perhaps make her lose the speck of control she was currently maintaining.

  
“I think the TV remote, or Henry’s flashlight has AAs,” Regina turned the toy over and inspected it. “I need to test each one of these. Ruby said there is a lifetime warranty and money back guarantee if they are faulty from the manufacturer.”

  
“Test?” Emma felt a bead of sweat roll down the side of her face, as she first pictured a factory full of sex toys coming down the conveyor belt, and then her mind’s eyes switch to a more interesting picture of all the things she could do with Regina to test out the toys.

  
“Yes, dear. Go ahead and open some more, while I try to find batteries,” Regina rose from the bed, the boxes shifted and Emma felt the loss of her immediately. She feared the intimate little spell they had together was over as Regina plodded out of the room. She took a long sip from her quickly disappearing glass of wine, and opened another package.

  
This one was interesting. A little remote and a set of panties with a butterfly vibrator nestled in the exact right spot. She read the instructions, noting that it had a 3 mile range for remote access. This could be fun. She imagined Regina sitting in her office working away at her desk, or leading a city council meeting, when she’d suddenly get a strong buzz right to her clit courtesy of Emma’s whim. To watch as her eyes darkened and her lips parted as if she was on the cusp between pain and pleasure, but trying to keep it together so no one would guess what was happening in her pants. Emma felt that way around the brunette as it was without a sex toy to enhance it; she would love to turn the tables and watch Regina lose her cool.

  
She worried her lip and eagerly read the rest of the directions, when Regina returned with just a few half-spent batteries, “This is all I could find. Henry took his flashlight with him, and these came out of the TV remote.”

  
“Let’s test this,” Emma held up the panties and remote, a wicked grin spreading across her face. If they were really going through with this, they might as well go all in.  
“Vibrating panties?” Regina took the remote and popped batteries into it, as Emma put the remaining ones in a little pack on waist of the underwear. Regina pressed the ‘on’ switch and then dialed the remote to the ‘low’ setting. The panties began to buzz merrily.

  
“They work!” Emma cheered and then as she was mustering up the courage to tell Regina to go put them on and hand over the remote, Regina beat her to it.  
“How about you go down to the general store and pick up a big new pack of batteries so we can continue our testing? Oh, and Emma I’m going to need you to wear those panties,” Regina swirled her finger in an enticing pointing motion, and sneered.

  
“What? Me? Why don’t you wear the panties?” Emma’s fantasy was crumbling before her eyes. She should have known Regina would have wanted control of the remote. She was the same way when they had movie nights with Henry. The clicker wouldn’t leave her sight.

  
“Because I will stay here and continue to inventory the collection, and maybe I’ll be merciful. Either way we need more batteries, and you said you wanted to test this product in particular.”

  
Regina had put her foot down, and Emma couldn’t lie to herself, she was already getting warm thinking about being out in public never knowing when the button would be pushed. She looked away and sighed in acquiesce. Regina put her hands on her hips and raised her head displaying a toothy grin of sheer mischief.

  
Emma dashed into the bathroom, wrestled off her jeans and non-enhanced underwear. She pulled the new pair on in a hurry, while Regina impatiently and insistently called from the other side of the door, asking if she was ready yet.

  
“Okay, okay. They’re on,” Emma huffed in exasperation. She immediately felt a sharp buzz against her ass. “Oh shit, I put them on backwards.”

  
She heard Regina laugh, as she switched them around, placing them just right this time. They were a surprisingly good fit. A little tight if anything, but in this case that wasn’t a bad thing.

  
She pulled her jeans back on along with her boots and emerged to find Regina with her finger just above the trigger, “Have a fun trip, and hurry back.”

  
Emma rolled her eyes and grabbed her keys. She headed out to the cruiser feeling like she was in a dream. She was overly aware of the panties and almost holding her breath never knowing when Regina would strike. Nothing had happened yet, and she eased behind the wheel to ignite the engine.

  
She was about a half a block down Mifflin when she felt a low purring vibration that immediately heated her up and distracted her. She thought of Regina probably watching out her bedroom window at the car as she crept down the street. She was driving awfully slowly, but she didn’t want to get in an accident.

  
When she turned right onto Main St, she was stopped by one of the only traffic lights in town. A car pulled up beside her in the turning lane. She tried not to look, but since everyone knew her, if she didn’t wave and smile, people would think she was a snob. She turned her head to the left and saw Leroy grinning at her in her slightly creepy way.

She waved, just as her panties blew up in a sharp and long burst of vibration that caused her to jaw to drop and her body to rock forward jerkily. “Oh My God,” she yelled as a haze sort of took over her brain.

  
“Yo, Sister- it’s green!” Leroy rolled down his window and he was pointing at the light. Emma nodded and mustered a smile, as she hit the gas and swerved into a parking spot in front of the store. She took a moment to regroup, and in that time, 3 short buzzes and 2 long ones reeled through her body. It was like Regina was beating out messages in Morse code on her clit. She took a few deep breaths to try and control herself, and looked in the visor mirror. Her eyes were dilated and her cheeks were red. She looked like she had been running.

  
When she got out of the car, her knees were wobbly and her gait unsteady. All she had to do was make it inside, get a pack of batteries, pay and get out. It shouldn’t be a problem. She walked/hobbled to the door without incident and made it inside. She searched for the aisle that batteries would be in and located it just as the intensity was turned up another notch or 3. She wondered how many speeds that remote had, while her eyelids fluttered and she knocked a few cans of spray paint off a display. “Jesus! Fuck!” she yelled out loud, practically unaware as the buildup finally over took her and an orgasm hit like a tidal wave.


	10. Heart Attack

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: had a request for more Granny and obliged.

Ava and Nicholas made strange faces in her direction as they passed, giving her a wide berth, in the aisle. She clamped her hands over her mouth and stumbled just a bit farther. She tried to recover as quickly as possible. A few deep breaths and a few steps later she saw the display of batteries.

  
As much as it was torture, it was also fun and she wondered how much Regina was enjoying this little game. The thought was interrupted by another long electrifying pulse. It was too soon, and she was so sensitive. She just couldn’t bear it, and she bit her lip to keep from screaming. Stars danced in her eyes as she reached the display of batteries, noticing that it was conspicuously empty. Little placards at the back of the hanging racks showed what batteries were supposed to be there, but the actual packs were missing. There were plenty of DD and C batteries, but the AA section was mysteriously wiped out.

  
Emma turned the rack to the other side and saw the last package of AAs hanging right there. Just as she went to grab them, more incessant and even strong vibration shot through her pussy and she paused, letting out a pained shriek and letting in a deep breath. Even as her body reacted, she imagined the payback she was going to dole out on Regina…as soon as she got back to the house with batteries.

  
When she regained her senses, she noticed the batteries were gone. Had she just imagined them? Then she looked up to see Granny looking very concerned and clutching onto the last pack of AAs.

  
“Emma?! Oh, my god, I think you’re having a heart attack!” Granny grabbed her arm and tried to pull her to the floor of the store. She cupped her hand to her mouth and screamed, “Help! Help! Call 911. Sheriff down!”

  
“No, no…I’m fine,” Emma frowned and crumpled to the floor as another orgasm started deep inside her. She went rigid, her eyes and mouth open wide. Granny took a handkerchief and mopped the sweat off of her forehead while holding her hand.'

  
“You’re not fine, you have all the symptoms. Trust me, I had a heart attack before and I know. The cold sweat, flushed cheeks, the unusual fatigue, and pain all over. You’re gonna be okay, we will get you to the hospital. You are not gonna die today. Not today, no sir! You hear me God!?” Granny spoke urgently and passionately right in Emma’s face, as a crowd of shoppers gathered around her.

  
“Oh, no, God no…Please, I appreciate the concern, but I am not having a heart attack…it’s something else,” Emma squeaked out between panting breaths and aftershocks as she clenched her thighs together and prayed that everyone would stop looking at her. She tried to shake her hand out of Granny’s death hold to no avail.

  
“Don’t fight it, Emma. You just need to relax and let it go,” Granny murmured, now patting her back as she tried to sit up straighter on the cold tile floor.

  
Emma looked up to the see concerned faces of several people. The owner was on the cell with the hospital, and muffled the phone with one hand, while assuring everyone that the paramedics were on the way.

  
“Could I have a little space?” Emma practically whispered, squeezing her eyes shut and dying of embarrassment. She hoped that Regina was done with her erotic torture for a little while. She never intended to make such a public display and she was about to die not of a heart attack but from embarrassment. How was she going to explain this to the paramedics?

  
“Give her room, everyone back up a bit,” Granny put a hand out to widen the circle of patrons around the fallen blonde. A few moments passed while people spoke in hushed tones all around her, and Granny continued to hold her hand. Emma wasn’t sure what to do next, she was calm enough now that she could speak normally, but Granny wasn’t going to let her go anywhere.

  
“Let’s make a prayer circle, and have a moment of silence,” the Blue fairy had just butted in. She wasn’t even a real nun, but maybe she had picked up some spiritualism in Storybrooke.

  
“I don’t think I need any medical attention. I’m feeling much, much better. I think I just cramped out for a minute,” Emma tried meekly, knowing it was no use.

  
Blue indicated for everyone to hold hands, and make a circle. “Please let this dear child of God, our Savior and brave Sheriff, Emma Swan, be surrounded in light and love. And now let us have a moment of silence for our dear girl.”

  
The silence was when Regina chose to blast her ass with another wave of heavy vibration. Emma twisted her hips to relieve the pressure. And to think she had been pleased with how tight those panties fit, but now she couldn’t get away from the overly strong sensation in her most intimate regions. Plus, everyone could hear the buzzing.  
“What’s that sound?” Someone broke the silence to ask.

  
“Just my phone,” Emma quickly covered, trying and failing to sound nonchalant. “Lots of Fff-facebook…notif..ications…uhhh, hng!”

  
“Why are your notifications coming from between your legs?” Granny asked looking down at Emma’s clamped thighs and then over the rim of her glasses to meet her eyes as Granny’s eyebrows shot up in question.

  
“Uh, just where I keep my phone, haha,” Emma smiled, her cheeks felt so hot she thought her face was about to spontaneously combust unless her vagina did first. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she let out a little moan as another punctuated buzz hit her right in the pussy.

  
Granny had caught on to exactly what was going on, “Okay, I will see to Emma. Everyone can disperse. She’s gonna be okay; nothing to see here, move it along people. Tell the paramedics they aren’t needed.”

  
She addressed Emma directly, “Really, you little hussy? How dare you go about worrying us half to death, when you are out in public just getting off like it’s no big deal?”

  
Emma faked a cough to try and cover up her whimpering, “I just came for batteries. I didn’t mean to upset anyone. ”

  
“You think I don’t know that Ruby’s orders are in? The whole town came for batteries so they could go home and come in private. Well, Missy, looks like you already have batteries for the deluxe butterfly vibrating panties with 3 mile radius remote control, and 7 variable speeds.”

  
Emma looked at her half surprised and half impressed.

  
“I ordered a pair too, makes baking pies at 5am a lot more fun, but still…you’re not getting any of these batteries.” Granny shook the pack she had in her hand in front of her face just to rub it in.

  
Emma stood up, feeling ashamed, her legs were jelly and she felt super lightheaded, “Ok, ok, you’re right; we just got excited to try the stuff out. You can understand that, right? I didn’t realize just how powerful it was going to be.”

  
“Hmph, well, I suppose I am a little impressed. I would stay and berate you some more, but now that I have my batteries I must be getting home. Can’t wait to the try out the Abraham Lincoln! It’s long and tall and it’s got a little top hat clit tickler. I should have been home ‘Fourscore and seven orgasms ago’.”

  
“Sorry, I do appreciate that if I ever do have a heart attack, you were very helpful,” Emma said humbly, trying to smooth things over.

  
“Well, you remember the story of the _boy who cried wolf_ , we certainly wouldn’t want to see the story of the _Sheriff who cried heart attack, but was actually having multiple orgasms in the middle of the general store_. See if that one is in Henry’s book,” Granny put up her nose and started walking up to the counter. She turned back momentarily and winked, while Emma put her hands in her back pockets and stiffened her posture.

  
“Be sure to tell old Regina that she’s got quite the timing.”


	11. Sweet Revenge

Regina dropped the remote control momentarily and shook out her fingers, they were cramping up from hitting the buttons so many times. She could only imagine what she was doing to Emma; then again she wasn’t sure how much was too much. She didn’t have any experience with vibrators so she could only imagine. Maybe she was doing it all wrong? She smiled wickedly and hit the button again for good measure.

Every time she sent a vibration through the remote she felt herself get more and more turned on. She couldn’t wait for Emma to make it back from the store with those batteries so she could jump her. This was a delicious build up: knowing what she was doing to Emma without even touching her, but she was getting so worked up she was tempted to touch herself and take the edge off, but she knew it would be so much better if she waited for the blonde to return.

She was starting to get a bit concerned as the store wasn’t very far away and Emma had been gone for awhile. She feared that maybe she had pushed her too far, or that she had scared her off with the dozens of sex toys and she wasn’t planning on coming back at all. The blonde did have a tendency to run away from people. Regina squashed down her negative thoughts, as she convinced herself that Emma was just in so much bliss she was taking her sweet time coming back, and not wanting it to end. She cranked the dial and hit the pulsating button, just to mix it up.

In between, ramping up the vibrations, Regina had managed to open nearly all of the packages, discovering all sorts of new things. The lingerie, in particular was most appealing. Her only regret did not know about these products when she first cast the curse. She could have had nearly 30 years of satisfaction and she certainly wouldn’t have needed to waste her time listening to Graham’s inane pillow talk.

Rubbing her thighs together in frustration and impatience, she picked up her phone and rattled off a text to check Emma’s ETA: _I need you back here now._

_…_

Emma lurked around the back of the store for a few minutes, trying to come up with a backup plan. She couldn’t show up to Regina’s empty handed without the batteries. Plus, she was having a difficult time walking. Each step was causing more pain and less pleasure to her oversensitive nether regions. Maybe she should have taken that trip to the hospital after all.

After a particular pulsating vibration, she couldn’t really take it anymore, and shuffled into the tiny bathroom of the store and pulled off the panties. She put her tight jeans back on, and felt a new tinge of pain as the rough seam scraped against her clit. Stuffing the panties into her back pocket, she widened her stance and hoped that she just looked like she had a confident swagger as she made her way as discreetly as possible out of the store and back to the car, wondering if she had any batteries back at the station.

She jumped when she felt another vibration come from her back pocket, and then another, but this one came from her phone. She thought she was in the beginning stages of developing vibration induced PTSD, as she threw the panties into the passenger seat and watched as they leaped and jived all over the seat like they were possessed. It was amusing now that she had escaped Regina’s prolonged torture. She checked her phone, even before picking it up knowing that it was Regina getting impatient. Even though those panties had about taken her down and out, she felt new ripples of excitement course through her at the thought of what could do to get back at her. It would be her turn and her rules once she got back to the house. That was enough for her to brave going back without batteries, and even if Regina was upset she’d just have to find a way to punish her that didn’t involve vibrators.

A tingling shudder ran through Emma’s body as she contemplated what she had initiated and was about to follow through on Regina-wise. The admission that the brunette had made that she placed that order for Emma was a big deal because they had danced around the issue for a long time. Mostly, covering their lust in thinly veiled hate, but now the game had changed and all that pent up tension was bubbling up to the surface, and like a churning lava filled volcano, it was gonna blow.

Emma drove slowly, nervous and eager to get back, but mostly to let her pride and her vagina recover for a few extra minutes. If Regina was texting that she needed her right away then it was all the more reason to let her suffer for a bit longer. Then Emma formed a plan for her act of sexual revenge, it didn’t involve a chainsaw or anything, but it was going to anger the Mayor just as much. The sound of the panties buzzing manically all over the seat demonstrated again just how raring to go Regina must be getting.

The cruiser pulled into the driveway and Emma looked up to see Regina staring down at her, with her hands on the windowsill. She blinked and looked back, but Regina had disappeared. Emma didn’t bother to knock; she just opened the front door and walked casually inside not surprised to find that Regina was not there to greet her. The panties had finally stopped buzzing, though that may have been due to the fact that the batteries had finally died rather than a reprieve from the controller of the remote. None the less they were practically ruined, and so Emma’s fantasy of having Regina take a turn had to be put on the back burner. She’d save that for another time anyhow, as she a far more devious idea.

When she reached the top of the stairs, noting her nether regions had cooled mildly, she wasn’t sure what to be prepared for upon reentering Regina’s sanctuary. She hoped she wouldn’t be too upset that she had returned without batteries, and she needn’t have worried anyhow. The door was only half closed and as Emma approached she heard something that sounded not unlike a swarm of bees.

Vibrators and dildos that didn’t have the capacity to vibrate somehow were dancing like sugarplum fairies in mid-air buzzing merrily while Regina reclined in bed conducting her little sex symphony with a waving hand. Emma’s jaw dropped when she saw Regina in a black silk shorty robe, tied loosely over something even shorter and silkier that clung to the curves of her cleavage like a magnet on metal.

“Finally,” Regina didn’t even break concentration from her focus on the vibrators moving like a carousel, up and down and around and around above the empty boxes and bubble wrap that had been unceremoniously left on the floor.

“I see that I didn’t even need to go get batteries,” Emma felt equal parts pissed off that her trip to the store had been a waste and also intrigued by the display of magic. She should have known it had been a rouse. She threw the wet, dead panties at Regina’s head breaking her concentration as she reacted a bit slowly and missed catching them. The magic only faltered for a moment and then she recovered using one hand to keep the toys buzzing and the other to peel the panties off of her forehead and take a look.

“Aren’t you impressed?” Regina asked smugly with a faux look of hurt, blinking her dark eyes at the blonde. She looked Emma over from head to toe, stalking “I, for one, have never been so happy to see you….so you’re not wearing any?”

Emma made a ‘tsk’ noise then an indignant ‘humph’ trying to find the words to explain the ups and downs of her simple little trip to the store, but decided to let it drop as her eyes stalked up and down the slim, toned form lying in wait in bed.

She licked her lips greedily and started looking through the piles of non-vibrating adult items for something she had noticed in the catalogue, and hoped was included in Regina’s purchase. The mayor dropped the magic act, watching the toys fall and land on the carpet. She cocked her head and grabbed at the sheets as she wondered what Emma could possibly be looking for. She hadn’t seen her in this kind of mood for a long time. Maybe she had thrust too much zing on the poor woman and broken her?

“That was a little much, don’t you think?” Emma kept searching through tubes of lube and massage oil, she found a package containing a creepy blow up doll and quickly tossed it aside.

“Honestly, I didn’t know how much was too much, but I will admit…I had an idea,” Regina goaded at her as she loved to do. She lie back on the bed and crossed her arms, settling in, crossing and uncrossing her legs, unable to stand the anticipation. “And it is only fair, that I let you do what you will with me. Even if you think it’s too much.”

That was as close to begging as Emma had ever heard Regina get, but that was about to change. By the time Emma finished with her she’d be doing a lot more than begging: _Pleading. Praying. Beseeching_. Even _imploring_ if she reacted the way Emma expected her to. Her heart sped up when she found the box. She snickered and turned her back so Regina couldn’t see.

“What’s that?” She asked immediately, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Emma could tell it had taken all of Regina’s willpower not to touch herself while Emma was out, especially surrounded by so many implements that would have provided relief in mere seconds with how horny she appeared. It was a beautiful sight and she planned to continue to enjoy it for some time.

For as far as Regina had gone in pushing her to her limit on how much her body could handle in one session, Emma was going to see just how much deprivation Regina could handle before she crumbled. She held up the chastity belt and tested the lock before replying cryptically, “It’s a surprise.”

 

 


	12. Hella Gay

Emma didn’t want to give away the game just yet, she wanted Regina to realize it on her own, and preferably when she was half mad with want. She considered herself fair and not unnecessarily cruel so she would give her a chance to behave. One chance only. 

“Here’s how this is going down: I can touch myself, I can touch you, and you can touch me, but under no circumstance are you allowed to touch yourself,” Emma moved to the foot of the bed while Regina’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. It sounded too good to be true. She had no desire to touch herself, if she wanted that she simply would have taken what she needed while Emma was out gallivanting around town enjoying all that pleasure that she had doled out via remote control. She was surrounded by magically operated sex toys for God’s sake; Emma wasn’t even appreciative of the amount of restraint she had already endured. 

She felt she was somehow being played, but she didn’t really understand how, “those rules are preposterous. Why would I want to touch myself when you just said you were going to touch me?” 

Emma crossed her arms and shook her head in false pity. She was about to explain the difference between a want and a need to Regina in as cripplingly condescending a tone as she could muster, but then she decided that actions would speak far louder than words. 

“Well, then forget I said anything, but again, you have to promise that you won’t try to touch yourself.” 

“I won’t,” Regina snapped as distrust darkened her eyes, but she quickly forgot about that when Emma pulled at the hem of her own shirt, lifting it up over her head. Regina swallowed at the way the waistband of her jeans hugged at her hips, and the oh-so pleasing quality of her toned stomach and cute circular belly button. She was lovely to look at, so…symmetrical, and she could see that her nipples stood in relief to the grey sports bra she wore. There was something to be said when the secret object of one’s unbidden desire was stripping willingly in front of her: made her want to pat herself on the back for a job well done.

Regina shifted from her position on the bed. She had been enjoying the view from a lazy recline, but as the clothes were coming off she turned over to her knees, crawling to the edge of the bed for a closer look…maybe some touching…maybe some tasting. She always found it best to engage all of her senses when she was enjoying something whether it be a new cuisine, nature, or in this case, a new lover. Truthfully, Emma hadn’t been that great of a Savior when it came to thwarting evil on her own, but maybe that title had more to do with the fact that she was a product of true love. Though she didn’t want Emma’s reputation to cloud her judgment, she was dying for a taste. Regina was most definitely in need of some hardcore savioring now. 

She placed a cool hand on said Savior’s warm belly and traced her quivering abs right up and over her tight oblique’s. The touch made Emma shiver. She had to remind herself that she was in control and she would not give in to Regina’s demands. The way those dark eyes were looking at her body was both with lust and with reverence, and when she placed a wet, but gentle kiss right below her belly button, all the while maintaining eye contact. Emma about decided to fuck her torture/revenge plan and tackle the woman onto the mattress to fuck her. 

They were still new to each other and to this, and the sudden lapse in confidence shook Emma’s resolve. Also, currently shaking her resolve was Regina methodically popping the button on her jeans and slowly dragging the zipper down. 

“I know you’re not wearing anything under here,” she murmured as her she slid her soft hands down the back of the jeans and gave her ass a hearty squeeze. Emma let out a shaky exhale and her lungs immediately expanded again as she took in a deep steadying breath. Truly, she thought her body had had enough already thanks to the intense vibration of the panties, but here she was wet again, responding and aching. 

When Regina rose to her knees, her nails scraping up Emma’s back and plucking playfully at the elastic of her bra, her resolve was tested all the more. And when she grasped firmly to her hard biceps all while visually appraising and appreciating her, it dawned on Emma that this was far harder than she anticipated because it was one thing to think of Regina from a distance, but this was so very personal. This was tangible and her own senses kicked into overdrive when those delicate fingers snaked past her arms, lightly grazed her collar bone and splayed over her neck pulling her gently into a soft yet passionate kiss. 

Emma automatically deepened the kiss, wrapping her arms around Regina and pulling her warm, solid silk clad body flush against her own almost bare torso. Teeth nipped playfully at her lips and she opened her mouth to let in a wet hot questing tongue. The kiss made her head swim and then those fingers were twined in her hair tugging her scalp in the most tantalizing way. Emma just pulled her tighter unwilling to break the spectacular kiss that sent lights popping behind her eyes and a fire alight in belly. 

The sound of smacking and light moaning coming from the brunette egged Emma on, and she snaked her hands around to the loosely tied belt around Regina’s waist and unraveled it completely so her she could feel even more of her. She wanted much more of her, but she did her best to keep her ministrations light and teasing, even as Regina was taking on the role of the heavy hitter. Her left hand sliding from her hair down her neck and around her back to journey between their bodies and knead at her breast, pinching when she reached her nipple. Her right hand was certainly not going to be left out, and made a little pilgrimage sailing to Emma’s hip and slowly dipping down the front of her open jeans seeking her source of heat. 

Somewhere over the pouring din of sound that had filled her head, Emma realized that this was not going at all how she had envisioned her revenge, and it took as much willpower as she could muster to break away and pull Regina’s hand out of her pants. She gave her a desperate shove, in an attempt to gain distance, but she took the gesture giddily and fell happily back on the bed with a contented sigh, motioning for Emma to get on up on her. 

Which she did, not surprisingly, first ripping her bra over her head and haphazardly pulling her jeans down her legs, and casting them aside. She then found herself leaping like she had just tripped over a log in the woods onto the bed. Regina had worked her arms out of her silk robe and she now wore just the lacy barely there lingerie. She rolled to her side to face the blonde, not speaking, just staring at one another and listening to each other’s shallow breathing, while their hearts hammered and blood rushed. 

Emma licked her lips and cast her eyes over the other women’s luscious curves, thinking how magnificent she looked with kiss bruised lips, flushed cheeks and darkened full pupils. Regina hungrily grabbed at her body pulling her down and pushing in to get under her. Wanting to see all of her, Emma pulled thin straps of the teddy over Regina’s shoulders and then forcefully whisked the thin garment off in one pull. 

When she was fully naked, she spread her legs, and Emma looked unabashedly excited that she had offered herself up so willingly. Regina only said one word, as it seemed it was all she was capable of, but she said it so nicely, and so desperately, that Emma almost relented, “Please?” 

But she swallowed the hard lump in her throat, and denied the Queen’s request, shaking her head, and heard her own voice crack as she choked out, “Not yet.”


	13. Wait and See

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: It appears I've been accused of torturing my dear readers, but I am so innocent. Swear. This is a writing experiment where I write whatever I can in one hour a day and that's it. Sorry not sorry. But really would you have it any other way?

Regina made a pouty face that was goddamned adorable, and Emma almost chuckled, but she did have some sense of self-preservation so she schooled her features into a semblance of her best impression of tough and crossed her arms in front of her bare chest. 

The brunette writhed and her pout slowly turned into a grimace, and then a look of hurt flashed over her face and she crossed her arms as well lifting her chin and focusing on the opposite wall. For a moment, Emma was certain Regina was just going to tell her leave, but she took a gamble that her need outweighed her pride in this one circumstance.  
She wanted to tease her to her breaking point even if it meant she’d have her own breakdown first. Soothingly, Emma ran a finger softly over Regina’s ankle, tracing a little circle, while Regina stared down at her like she was absolutely fucking crazy…and ungrateful. 

“I think our passion has gone beyond ankle rubbing, I would prefer more direct contact… please,” Regina was beginning to get that Emma wasn’t just going to give in and ravage her, but it was damn hard for her to ask for what she wanted. 

Emma let her finger trace up a tight calf muscle and wind around like a vine, sending shivers of sparkling sensation up Regina’s leg. With devious intent Emma sat up and acted completely disinterested. She lifted Regina’s foot, kneaded it firmly, and leaned down seductively to kiss her arch. She pulled back and dropped her foot to the bed.  
“Nah, I don’t think I’m ready for sex yet. We should really get to know each other a bit. I think it’s moving too fast. I mean really, don’t cha think?” Emma smirked cruelly knowing her sarcasm was lost on Regina who now had a murderous intent in her gleaming eyes. 

“Is that so?” She gritted out between angry sounding growling breaths. 

“Yee--aaah,” Emma smacked her lips and balled up her fists, shaking her head and raising her eyebrows as she met Regina’s glare with a cool calm. She was playing the most dangerous game, and Emma could see Regina’s apprehension in the way her face was scrunching up and her nostrils were flaring. She scrambled back a bit, her confidence flickering out, because she also knew the look Regina sported when deciding between ripping out a heart and throwing a fireball. 

“You want to talk? I thought that portion of evening had concluded,” Regina was trying because she was desperate, but she didn’t trust her level of patience, not when her body felt so in need and there was only one person in all the realms that could end her suffering. 

And they were back to the place Emma wanted to be, she knew she could only push so far, but she also knew she could push farther than anyone else. She planned to do what she was good at: play dumb, “It’s just I’ve never done this before.” 

Puzzlement crossed over Regina’s features and she couldn’t tell if the savior was being sincere or messing with her head, but she took the opportunity as an in, in her favor. She placed a comforting hand on Emma’s shoulder, and moved closer like a cat about to pounce on a mouse, stalking. 

“You’re afraid? Is that why you’re determined to stall?” Regina pushed closer attempting an awkward naked hug, she stroked a hand through Emma’s hair, and tried to get onto her lap, as the sheets bunched beneath them, and discarded boxes fell over the edge of the bed. 

Emma had not expected this level of understanding, but she rolled with it, letting Regina get close, and when she smelled so lovely and felt so luscious it was impossible to resist the affection. She was under the witch’s spell just like that and they were kissing, her mind was gone, and she heard herself moan as Regina pushed her down onto the bed and splayed out on top of her. 

“Better,” Regina broke the kiss and panted out, pleased that she was once again on top and for once winning. She nipped at Emma’s jawline and down her neck, and smoothly swung one leg between the blonde’s and the other over Emma’s and then she started to grind slowly and sensuously in a way that made the muscles of her back ripple and her ass rise and fall in exquisite undulation. Emma threw her head back when Regina’s thigh pressed hard against her and pleasure swept over her. The little puffs of breath against Emma’s sweaty neck were coming in quick succession from Regina as she was building up tension and working her wet heated pussy against Emma’s thigh. 

“Yessss,” Regina hissed wantonly as she rocked against her harder and Emma moaned in agreement, loving the feel of Regina’s weight pressing down on her; all that skin flush against her own, but this wasn’t the plan and as much as she couldn’t deny she fucking loved it, and wanted it she had to stick to her guns. She still hadn’t forgiven Regina from her torment earlier, even if her body had. 

Maybe just a little bit more, Emma’s mind fought with her comprised will power, just a little bit more and then she’d toss Regina off of her, but it felt so good and they were both so close and Regina was kissing her face all over and moaning like she was in rapture, getting closer to release by the second. Emma came back to herself, finding that her hands were roughly encouraging Regina’s hips by squeezing her ass in time with their rhythmic movements, movements with were rapidly becoming less rhythmic and more and frantic as they were both steadily climbing up Orgasm Mountain. 

Emma took as deep a breath as she could muster and forced her eyes open, to be greeted with the sight of the top of Regina’s head, her face burrowed against her neck, the feeling of hot steamy breath against her and the sound of their bodies colliding filled her ears. She deftly rolled them both over in a now or never moment and Regina let out a surprised yet delighted holler. 

Emma pulled back, sitting back on her heels, her head rushed and her body felt immediately lost and painfully empty as Regina’s hips sought the loss of contact and greedily pushed after her. 

“Oh, my fucking… Emma! Don’t stop…get back… me, I’m so close,” The words came out in a breathless garble of frustration and then Regina shook her head unable to clear it, and her hand flew down to rub her demanding clit. She threw her head back, and her free hand lifted up and out searching for Emma, but Emma’s jaw was slack as she watched Regina pleasure herself so freely, her legs lifting and knees bending as she rubbed faster circles, finding her rhythm and pace once more, until Emma realized she was breaking the only rule. 

She lunged forward and stilled Regina’s wrist. Regina opened half opened her gleaming eyes. She cleared her throat haplessly, hoping that Emma had come to her goddamned senses, “Yes, dear, please finish me.” 

“You touched yourself,” Emma meant to say it sternly, but it sounded like couldn’t believe it and she was in wonder. It was so sexy just watching her and knowing how she was feeling and that the Queen was so worked up and aroused by her that she almost let go of her wrist and gave her ‘all clear’ to just let her get back to it because she so wanted to see her cum. She also wanted to be the one responsible for giving her an orgasm and so she was yet again conflicted. She let her instincts take over and couldn’t help herself being so close to Regina’s most intimate region to just give her pussy a little kiss and breathe in the arousing scent of her. 

“Oh!” Regina stammered out, finding her emotions and senses were on a fucking rollercoaster. One minute she was so close and then so far away and she felt as if the world had ended when Emma kissed her there, and then more kisses, light peppery kisses over her swollen wet sensitive skin, and she watched eagerly, pulling her knees wide as she was able, and sitting up to get the best view as Emma gave her a long, slow savory lick setting every nerve ending off like a bomb. 

And then just when she was so ready for Emma to finally go in for the kill and suck her pussy until she came so, so wonderfully hard…well, it was then that that fucking savior bitch pulled away completely, sat up and wiped her mouth.


	14. Slippage

"I'm thirsty. I'll be right back. Don't move," Emma stood up letting out a growl and ran to the bathroom. She had to get away from naked lusty Regina, and calm the fuck down. Her tongue darted out and ran over her bottom lip tasting the other woman, and she squeezed her eyes shut so her head would stop spinning. She inhaled deeply and looked in the mirror. She reached out and rested her hands on the sink to keep her upright. She looked into her own eyes and promised herself this deprivation was worth it. A frustrated scream from the bedroom alerted her to the obvious fact that Regina was none too pleased.

That was an understatement, and Emma's eyes sharpened with fear and she felt like reentering the bedroom would be like the time she had to slay a dragon. She fully expected a fire ball to explode out of Regina's twat.

"Get back here this instant!"

"Com-ing!" Emma sung turning her head over her shoulder in a halfhearted attempt to lighten the mood.

"I'm not!" Regina barked flatly and Emma could just picture the vein in her forehead pulsing, her eyebrows crossed and the tendons in her neck straining in anger. All that lust filled anger, and all of it directed at her. Mmm. Emma's eyes widened in embarrassment that all the sex withholding from Regina was turning her on so very much.

She splashed her face with water and cupped her hands under the facet bringing a few scoops of cold H2O into her mouth. It did nothing to dampen her arousal. She thought she'd been done for after her pussy was pureed by the Vagi-mix blender that was those panties, but nope, she was positively throbbing with want.

Then she heard the curious sound of silence. Regina had been making non-stop threats since Emma had abruptly vacated the happy place between the brunette's legs, but now she heard nothing but the thin stream of running water. She cranked off the facet and peeked around the door frame.

Regina was still in bed pointing and both fingers in the air like she was trying to make a decision. Emma chanced to peek farther into the room, and saw a scene that looked like she was commanding an arsenal of floating vibrators and dildos.

"Oh, hell no!" Emma busted into the room, just as Regina flicked her wrist to start the hot pink knobby vibrator buzzing. "Don't you dare, you agreed to the rules!"

"I dare!" Regina tut-tutted and with another whoosh of her finger the vibrator magically dive bombed toward her vagina.

Emma ran to intercept, flinging her naked body dramatically in front of the toy as if she was stepping into the line of fire. She effectively knocked it down, but did little to disarm it as it rolled and hopped along the carpet.

"Get out of my way!" Regina hollered trying to coax the toy back up off the floor. Emma chased it around and stomped on it until it gave its death rattle, stilled, came alive briefly, stilled and then twitched and sputtered, until it finally stayed unmoving for the count.

"I wasn't breaking the rule, I was simply bypassing it, because you are not living up to your promise," The Mayor settled back, padding her back with pillows and adjusting her shoulders until she was comfortable. She looked as regal as she would have on any throne.

"I never made any promise, but since you can't behave I'm placing your lady parts under arrest," Emma looked around for the almost forgotten chastity belt and retrieved it from the floor, in the process she haphazardly slipped on a tube of lube and tripped over a book called "Passion Party's Guide to Great Sex."

She made a mental note to read that later, but currently she had a mission to complete. If for no more good reason than if Regina's pussy was under lock and key Emma wouldn't be as tempted to give in and fuck her senseless at every given opportunity.

"What are you doing? Is that a-?" Regina looked at the newly retrieved leather and metal device, and clamped her thighs shut tight, crossed her arms and shook her head.

"If you let me put this on you, I will make you a promise," Emma taunted approaching Regina like when she was trying to catch one of Storybrooke's many feral cats to return to the Duchess. "I promise I will do whatever you want me to do for as long as you want me to do you, if you just play along a little bit longer."

Regina worried her lip, her eyes narrowing in thought. She heaved a sigh of resignation, knowing that she was in a bind. If she didn't indulge Emma she'd be denied just the same. She would never admit it, but despite the fact that she was dying for an orgasm, she was enjoying Emma's game. Though the novelty had already lost some of its shine and if she kept it for very much longer she wouldn't be able to tolerate it.

"Fine."

"Good," Emma motioned for her to lift her hips and she slipped the medieval looking contraption over Regina's legs and around her waist. The chastity belt had an antique look, but it was made of faux leather and smelled like vinyl. It didn't seem all that secure when Emma attempted to lock up Regina's loins, but she didn't expect the highest quality for $29.99. That's what the sticker on the box that promised to 'keep her erogenous zones under lock and key," but it was clearly just for the fantasy element cause it was ill fitting and the lock was less secure than the one Emma had on her childhood diary. It seemed to have an effect cause Regina was quiet and dare Emma speculate, being patient. Regina folded her hands in her lap, inspecting the metal and the lock.

"Are you comfortable?"

"Meaning?" She tilted her chin and glared, clearly she wasn't comfortable. Comfortable in her eyes would be having a nice hard climax at the ever capable hands of the Savior, and then a nice luxurious cat nap and then some chocolate ice cream for dessert. That sounded like the comfortable evening she had originally envisioned.

"I mean is it digging into your hip bone or pinching your skin?" Emma clarified, regarding Regina the way she did criminals that she threw into the jail cell. With the pensive, resigned way Regina was acting she might as well have been in jail. If they both lived through this little foray into sexual exploration they might have play Sheriff and criminal at a little afterhour's party down at the station. Emma quirked an eyebrow, while Regina turned her head and looked away.

"How long do I have to wear this?"

"Just long enough for me to do something important."

"You aren't going to take off and leave me like this? You know I am only doing this for your perverted…fantasy, this lock can't really hold me," Regina rambled out a diatribe letting herself get worked up again.

"Relax, I'm staying right here," Emma interrupted her and crawled back onto the bed just out of Regina's reach. She lie on her side, and let her hair cascade over her shoulder. She looked over Regina's body and then looked down at herself, bringing up right hand and pinching a nipple. "Remember that rule about how I could touch myself?"

"No…you're going to…make me watch while you-"

"Mm, hmm."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm going a little crazy as I seem to have caught a writing bug, and I just started a new little baby project to swan queen up season 4 of OUAT. Check that story out if you please: "The Sweetest Cherry in an Apple Pie." Even though that one just became my BAE, this story is still my side Ho and I can't resist a booty call.


	15. Shiny and Warm

A chill ran through Emma's body when she looked at Regina and saw the flurry of emotions reflected in her eyes. Emma kept eye contact while letting her hands languidly roam up and down her own chest. She brushed the backs of her knuckles over her breasts slowly and parted her lips taking in a breath as she grazed over an erect nipple. She lie close to her, shoulders and thighs barely grazing, but it was about all Emma could handle fore she knew if she positioned herself for more contact all bets would be off, and she'd lose her resolve and unleash Regina.

The brunette stayed quiet, her attention clearly rapt and focused on the blonde in bed next to her. Her chest was rising and falling in quick uneven breaths, and her jaw was slack. Her own hands were balled in fists at her sides clutching at the sheets, flinching a little whenever Emma brushed up against her. She didn't seem to be aware that her hips were circling trying to find the pressure she needed to relieve her suffering, but unable to get even the slightest hint of relief. She looked like she was sufficiently struggling and Emma approved.

Not for the first time, Emma felt her confidence take a steep drop. A hot flush of embarrassment crept up her neck, as she had never let herself be watched while she masturbated. Rationally she knew she had nothing to fear, Regina seemed more than excited to watch, if not furious that she wasn't allowed to participate which served to fuel the burning between the blonde's legs further.

The hot flames of shame equally aroused her, and also gave her the urge to cover up and look away. While she was determined to put on a show for Regina she also had to fight the awkwardness and uncertainty of being blatantly on display. The combination was more of a turn on then she expected it to be, especially finding those dark dilated eyes of her bed mate searing into her with lust and want.

She licked her lips and let her head sink back into the pillows. When she was by herself, in the privacy of her own bed, she would do it quickly, usually turning onto her stomach and quietly roll her hips against her hand while fantasizing about whatever came to mind, which for as long she could remember was Regina. Here she was in reality living her fantasy, and she wasn't going to roll over and hide.

She sat up and searched the floor for a nice fun toy, after all that was the purpose of this little rendezvous: to play with toys. She selected a moderately sized shiny black dildo that would be a nice fit, and hopefully ease her need to have something fill her. She crawled back up on the bed showing her selection to Regina, and settled in back next to her.

"Is that for you?" Regina's voice was hoarse and dry, and sounded impossibly low and sexy. She posed the question, but the answer was obvious. Emma nodded and took a deep breath as she spread her legs and hooked her left one over Regina's right.

"How are you?" Emma turned her head and looked over, smiling as if she was greeting her on the street.

The response was nothing more than an angry huff and a murderous glare. Regina shifted up so she could get a better view and moved herself closer to Emma, testing her by running the tips of her fingers down her side. Emma shivered and swallowed hard. Regina picked up on the positive response, "Don't underestimate my capacity to handle torture, dear. Though I can think of more pleasurable activities I'd rather be partaking in with you, I can handle whatever you've got to give," Regina boldly turned her head and kissed Emma's shoulder, then her collarbone, and up her neck. Emma knitted her brows in resistance, but her body relaxed and hummed as Regina twisted and draped an arm over her abdomen splaying her fingers out over her stomach. Her movements were slow and controlled in an attempt to prove just how calm she was trying to be. Emma squeezed her eyes shut, but made no move to stop her from kissing and touching her.

She felt enveloped by everything, her senses filled with the softness of the down feather pillow her head was nestled in and the delight of Regina slowly drawing circles over her stomach and kissing hot trails up and down her neck. Their legs were still entwined and Emma curled her hand around the dildo, drawing it up and down her center, teasing herself with the rounded smooth tip of the thing, slowly, slowly up and down. When she twitched and hummed softly at the sensation, Regina moved her gaze down and watched in awe as Emma slipped the toy inside.

She pulsed the toy in quickly and then pulled it out completely letting herself enjoy the feeling, and half for Regina's benefit. Emma felt her Regina lift leg a bit higher as Regina leaned over, draping her body across her torso. Emma pushed it in again loving the slight resistance as her body opened and acquiesced to the pleasurable intrusion. She pulled and pushed, the movement of her hips countering, giving and getting.

"Mmm, yes…this, this," Emma's head lolled from side to side as her voice rose in pitch and cracked. Plumes of magic wafted and mingled over both of their bodies and Emma felt Regina purr and hum in low tones. The reverberation quivered against her rib cage and coaxed her into moving the toy faster. Her inner muscles grabbed at it in need as her hips lifted up. She knew it wouldn't take but a minute as her body tightened around the toy, coiling in tension and building rapidly toward release.

Regina kissed her belly, breathing in deeply, before settling her chin on Emma's lower abdomen so she could watch and feel everything. Emma held her breath and her free hand searched desperately for Regina's, finding it, she interlaced their fingers and squeezed. Sweat formed on her brow as her body temperature rose from the sweet friction. Blood rushed in her ears and lights flickered behind her eyes, as she lost herself in the erotic sensations. She moved Regina's hand over her breast and held it there, encouraging her to squeeze roughly. She rocked faster and faster, squirming erratically as both women clung to one another.

Before she knew it, her orgasm hit from deep within her body, her body tensing as a ragged scream erupted from her throat. She flinched and gasped, and Regina moaned and cried out pressing her face into her stomach. Emma's muscles continued to twitch as she rode out the crashing waves, and felt as though she was floating off the bed, only anchored by the delectable weight and ocean of soft skin of the woman on top of her.

She lost track of time as she gently floated down from her high, and sunk into the bed. Regina had moved up and kissed her mouth passionately, Emma kissed back hungrily. Her fingers were soaked in slickness and she carefully removed the toy, and shivered as her body quickly cooled.

Regina pulled back and Emma opened her eyes to meet her shiny gaze, and tried to focus on her words, "Emma, God, please, I need you…I need."

She was practically choking out the words in broken staccato syllables, and Emma couldn't resist her for a moment longer. Despite the residual dizziness and the heaviness in her jellied limbs she pushed herself up and lunged toward Regina. They tangled up and pressed together as they kissed greedily. Emma willed her magic to unlock the metal belt and the lock snapped in half. Regina practically ripped it off and moaned as the cool air hit her drenched pussy.

They rolled around in bed; Regina wrapping her legs possessively around Emma's hips and pulling her down on top of her. In the distance, Emma heard something slam, and then stomping, she didn't really register what it was with Regina writhing under her desperate and wild.

It wasn't until the stomping got much louder and closer to the bedroom that Emma finally paid attention. Then a very familiar and distinct voice called out, "Mom? Are you in your room?"


	16. Get out of my house

Both women froze in fear and painfully sprung apart. Emma jolted up and lost her balance. Her foot twisted in the bed covers as she fell backwards and landed on a mine field of lumpy sex toys. One of them squeaked in protest. Regina cleared her throat repeatedly trying to work off the sex soaked quality it had taken on.

She almost sounded normal when she tried to smile and responded to Henry who was standing just outside the door, "Yes, Henry, don't come in! Just give me a minute."

Emma had scrambled to get up, her feet sliding and tripping over the littered floor as she panicked and ran around looking for her clothes.

"Okay, but Emma is missing and…" Henry was interrupted by another voice, none other than dear Snow, who had come along looking for Emma.

"We think she's sick, Regina. We need your help," Snow finished up for Henry, her voice distraught with worry.

Regina's jaw dropped in disbelief as she wondered if the whole town can come and knocked down her door. She ran her fingers through her wild hair, and slid her eyes shut as a painful headache formed like a crown on top of her head. She pressed her palm to her temple and rubbed aimlessly trying to calm down her raging frustration.

"Get dressed," Emma mouthed and threw the short black silk robe at Regina's head, trying to hurry her along.

Regina jumped off the bed and marched up to Emma. She threw the robe right back at her, and whispered with a hiss, "You go out there and assure them that you are not sick, and then convince Henry to go stay with his grandmother."

"I think I am going to be sick," Emma swayed dizzily, and a look of dread crossed her features as she eyed the door. Any second Snow was going to bust in there and bust them. Heaving a heavy sigh, Emma gave up on the fruitless search for her clothes, and wrapped up her naked body in the silk robe, which was even shorter on her than it was on Regina.

"Regina!?" Snow yelled again, and then the doorknob started to turn, as Emma sprinted over and intercepted Snow just before she barged in. Emma held the door firmly, and opened it just enough to stick her head out and hoped Snow couldn't see what lie beyond.

"Hi, mom," she squeaked out and tried to manage a smile, knowing that she looked flushed, her hair was a hot mess, and her eyes were glassy.

"Emma?" Snow recoiled slightly in shock. She did not expect her daughter to be popping out of Regina's bedroom.

"Mom?" Henry appeared in her line of sight looking just as puzzled. A wayward cloud of lavender colored magic rolled out from the bedroom which Henry noticed immediately, and his suspicions increased tenfold.

"Are you two making magic in there? I thought mom promised not to do magic in the house anymore?" Henry sounded betrayed, and tried to see around Emma and into the room to figure out just what was going on. Emma took a step forward to block the view and Snow got a look at what she was wearing.

She reached out a hand and placed it on her forehead to feel her temperature, "Oh, honey you are burning up. I heard you had an incident earlier down at the store, and I was so worried when you didn't come home or answer your phone. I've been calling all evening!"

"Oh…So yeah, you're right. Totally not feeling well at all and my phone must have been on… vibrate, sorry. Yeah, Regina is just taking care of me, so I better go back and lie down," she spit out the words tightly as she cringed and pushed Snow's hand off of her forehead. She gave an exaggerated apologetic look toward Henry. He wasn't buying the reason that she was in Regina's bedroom for a second.

"I smell magic and…something else... Mom isn't supposed to be doing magic in the house," Henry reiterated as he knitted his face into a scowl. Emma rolled her eyes, and tried to think of something. Sometimes the little stickler drove her nuts.

"Mom!"

"Yes, dear?" Regina appeared behind the blonde, and pulled the door open fully. Emma slammed her eyes shut and gritted her teeth preparing for the shit storm to touch down. When she didn't hear any screaming she opened one eye and dared to take a look at the Mayor, who was remarkably impeccably clothed and fresh looking. Turning her head she saw that the bed was made, and all of the toys were out of sight. A shimmering cloud of magic still hung in the air like a fog.

"Mom, why is Emma really here and why are you using magic?" Henry demanded to know as he and Snow looked back and forth from Emma to Regina.

"We're just planning your birthday party, and we wanted to surprise you," Regina covered smoothly, tilting her head and extending her hands like she had nothing to hide.

"My birthday isn't for 8 month and 21 days, it's a little early to make plans and that still doesn't explain the magic," Henry dropped his back pack and blinked his eyes in challenge.

Regina's eyes darted over to Emma, giving her the look that signaled it was her turn to attempt to smooth things over.

"Kid, I really am not feeling too hot, and we can talk about this all later, but you should probably head over with Mary Margaret to the apartment for tonight."

During this exchange Snow had been examining the fact that her daughter appeared to be wearing nothing but a slinky robe and there were purple marks dotting the side of her neck. Distracted and with a healthy dose of scathing judgment she agreed, "Yes, Henry, I think it's better that you come with me. I don't think you should be exposed to whatever your mother's have come down with."

"I'm not going to get sick, and I don't like staying over there- you guys don't even have cable," Henry whined. "Besides I want to tell you about my riding lesson. I got to ride the big black stallion!"

Regina smirked and choked back a chuckle, "the black stallion who likes to buck?"

Emma flared her nostrils and her face flushed hotter as her mind immediately replayed the great time she had with the black dildo. They all stood in awkward silence for a few long moments, held in a stalemate, unsure where to proceed.

"Whatever, I'm gonna go watch 'Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D'," Henry finally said breaking the silence. He turned to go to his room and called over his shoulder, "I didn't like the camp food, so I'm gonna need some dinner, Mom. Oh, and if you two really are planning my birthday: I want an Xbox One."

When Henry was out of earshot, Snow pursed her lips and placed her hands on her hips, "Emma, you should be ashamed of yourself. I should have known you were caught up in a hoodoo of debauchery from the moment you opened the door of Regina's bedroom."

"Mom, first off, I'm 30 years old. However I want to spend my personal time and with who, is my business. Second, I don't have to be in constant communication with you. I'm sorry I caught wrapped up and you were worried, but you found me and I'm fine."

Regina gave a jeering smile of satisfaction to Snow as she brushed passed her and headed down the stairs.

Snow watched her saunter away, noticing she was a bit shaky on her feet, and turned back to Emma to keep chewing her out, "You should have never went to that sex toy party, it's corrupted your brain…and all that magic! It's like a drug and you're addicted. Look who you are choosing to keep company with."

"That's the thing: it's my choice. I'm fine, and really, really need to go help Regina like right now. Can you please take Henry home with you?" Emma could not wait for this conversation to be over. She wished her magic was stronger so she could poof the hell outta there.

"Just bring Henry over when he's ready, and Emma- we are going to talk about this in depth, and with your father."

"Can't wait," Emma said as she shook her head and closed her eyes. She was starting to feel a headache of her own coming on, and she knew as soon as Snow and Henry left there was going to be hell to pay with Regina.

Snow huffed and turned to leave, she had a second thought and turned back around, "And Emma, put some clothes on your hoo-ha is practically showing."


	17. Meatloaf

"Mom, the remote won't work! Where are the batteries?"

Henry was in the den trying to watch TV, while Regina kneaded raw meatloaf with much more vigor than was needed. In her mind, she was imagining all of the things that she would require of Emma to make up for this epic fail. She had quite a list going already. First on the list: orgasm. Second, also: orgasm. Third: a massage, followed by an orgasm.

She cringed as her eyes slid to the left, and her lip quirked upwards as she tried to think of a plausible response for Henry that wasn't as truthful as, "I took the batteries to use in the sexual torment/pleasure of your other mother via remote controlled vibrating panties."

Instead she just pounded the meatloaf so hard that the counter shook and responded in a high disinterested voice, "Don't know."

"I'm gonna go look in the garage for more batteries," Henry called as he walked outside, and slammed the front door behind him.

Emma was scouring Regina's bedroom and could not find her original pair of panties anywhere. She looked under the bed to no avail. Then in the bathroom, where she last recalled their whereabouts, and even put her investigative skills to use by taking a cursory glance up at the ceiling fan to see if they had somehow been caught on a blade. Puzzled and panty less she eased into her jeans, bra and shirt. She stalled for a few moments, unwilling to face Regina just yet. Then there was Henry who was already angry that they were making magic. She had already had one sex talk with him, and she really didn't care to explain the ins and outs of 'magic lesbian sex involving props' as a secondary lesson. Maybe they'd save that for when he turned 14.

She looked in the closet and found all of the toys back in their boxes and stacked neatly. Telling herself to be brave, she made her way down the stairs and into the kitchen. By the loud, unforgiving chopping sounds she heard, she could wage that Regina was wielding a knife, or quite possibly slamming her head against the counter repeatedly.

"Hey," Emma entered with trepidation, finding Regina dicing an onion to death. She didn't look up or acknowledge her in any way for a long moment. The Sheriff almost turned around and ran out the door and then Regina spoke.

"Are you feeling satisfied, Ms. Swan?" She ground out the question with each chop of her knife as she pulverized that poor onion.

"Is that a trick question?" Emma blew a strand of hair out of her face, and placed her palms on the kitchen island.

"Keep your distance," Regina warned, looking up briefly to punctuate the caution with a glare. "It's not a trick question. Let me be more direct: how many orgasms have you had today?"

"Um…around five or so," Emma cleared her throat, as nervous energy coursed through her. Regina turned her back and tightened the strings of her apron as she moved over to add the onion bits to the meatloaf in progress.

She squirted a healthy dose of ketchup into the mix with a blurp, "Tell me about them."

Emma listened for any sign of the kid, but heard nothing and started speaking in an uncertain tone, "Oh, okay…uh, the first one was pretty damn awesome. Top notch. The second one totally took me by surprise, but was equally awesome. It was almost better than the first one. The third/fourth ones were, well, have you ever seen that movie? What's it called? Um, 'Drag Me to Hell'? They were kinda like that. My clit just couldn't take it."

"And the fifth orgasm?" Regina nodded and stomped her foot in impatience listening intently, but feeling utterly jealous and resentful.

"The fifth one was the best. God, with that black bonk-bonk thing and you holding my leg just right…mmm, it was just amazeballs," Emma's eyes fluttered shut at the memory and a big smile lit up her face as she hummed in delight.

A loud smack on the counter snapped her out of it. She flinched as she watched Regina's shoulders clench and tighten. She walked around the kitchen slamming the door of the spice cabinet and practically pulling the fridge door off the hinge.

"Do you know how many orgasms I've had today?" Regina's voice became very low and strained.

Emma knew this had to be a trick question, but she just shrugged and looked down in shame. She cursed herself for being so honest with her orgasm descriptions. Maybe she should have downplayed how great the sex was for her.

"Zero, Ms. Swan. Zero orgasms. Despite our rubbing against each other like dry sticks trying to start a fire in the midst of a drought, and me going dutifully along with all of your rules, zero orgasms. Nada. Zilch. None. Zip," she clicked her tongue after each staccato syllable.

"I'm sorry…" Emma took a step forward and Regina paused in her cooking/ food homicide.

She put up a hand to stop her in her tracks. She crossed her ankles, and leaned back against the counter, "Don't say that word to me. You aren't sorry. You had your chance to fuck me senseless and you kept me in total sensory deprivation. You aren't sorry, you were being downright cruel."

"I didn't mean to keep you deprived for this long, and do you know how hard it was for me to not give in and fuck you senseless?" Emma tried to reason with the woman and if she would just listen to her explanation she would see just how very badly she wanted to fuck her gently all night long. She hadn't anticipated the untimely arrival of her intrusive family.

"Do you know how many orgasms I've had this week?"

"Noooooo," Emma bit her bottom lip and braced herself for the answer, while trying to discreetly look for a rolling pin or some weapon she could use to defend herself if Regina decided to attack.

"Zero. And this month? Again, zero," Regina's mouth formed an 'O' shape, as she prolonged the word 'zero', and repeated it a few more times to really hammer home the point. Her neck tilted forward as her eyes pierced into Emma's.

The blonde took a step backwards, and felt her legs start to shake in fear, "What about your dude, Robin? You must have, you know, with him?"

"Unfortunately, his golden arrow does miss its mark, and by a wide margin might I add. Thanks for bringing that back up again, just like you brought back his dead wife. They're very happy together should you care to know," Regina licked her lips and turned back to the meatloaf, finally putting it out of its misery by placing it into the oven to bake.

"Are you going to tell me that you haven't had any orgasms all year?" She tried to make a poor joke to distract from the recently brought up sore point, but Regina wasn't chuckling.

"Well, I can't say that… there was a nice relaxing moment in the bath with the running facet, so I suppose that counts," Regina sniffed in bitterness, and wound the timer for the meatloaf.

"That's good, I guess," Emma scratched at the back of her neck and flipped her hair, wondering how she was going to fix this problem. Henry didn't seem to be going anywhere, and unless she knew that Regina wouldn't do anything with him in the house. She contemplated hustling her into the garage and bending her over the tool box, but that seemed in poor taste. Regina didn't deserve that.

"You owe me."

"I know, I know, and I want to pay up as soon as possible…with interest," Emma agreed, wringing her hands together and trying once again to move closer.

"You're going to give me thirty orgasms: one for each day of the month. Each one better be spectacular and… creative," Regina didn't mince her words as she made her sex demands.

Emma nodded solemnly accepting the challenge as she imagined what all this was going to entail. She made a note to clear her schedule for the foreseeable future as she knew when Regina wanted to cash in an orgasm token she would want payment upon delivery. No I.O.U's accepted. She felt like she had just received marching orders, but her deployment would be to paradise. She cracked her neck and then her knuckles in preparation, then couldn't help but point something out, "But it's October, there are thirty-one days in this month."

Regina cocked an eyebrow as she realized the Savior was right, "very well, you owe me thirty-one orgasms. Would you care to stay for dinner? We're having meatloaf."


	18. Bribery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Alright, one more chapter of sorting things out and then we are finally getting into the territory that will fulfill the original prompt I got: Anonymous said: Idk if you take prompts or even have written anything in a while, but could you write a fic where Emma tests every fucking sex toy, you know of, on Regina. I'm bit bored of the strap-on fics and wanting to read something else. And btw I love your writings!

The dining room was silent except for the occasional clanking of forks hitting the china. Some issues needed to be addressed, but no one wanted to bring it up.

"Good meatloaf," Emma commented and shoveled another load into her mouth. She could tell it was taking everything in Regina's power to sit patiently through dinner. At least it was giving Emma a chance to think of thirty-one ways to get her off. She should probably start a list.

"Yeah," Henry agreed, mirroring Emma's actions and eating another over loaded forkful.

The meatloaf was actually really tasty. Some say love is a secret ingredient, but Emma was beginning to think it was a hearty dollop of sexual frustration combined with a sprinkle of murderous rage that made for good eats.

Regina shuffled the food back and forth on her own plate, sitting up straighter she adjusted in her seat and twisted her napkin around in her lap, "Make sure to eat your peas as well."

Emma wasn't sure if that was directed at her or Henry, but she scooped up a mouthful of peas and ate them dutifully. She was in no position to deny any more of Regina's requests.

"So when are you guys going to tell me about the magic?" Henry jostled his leg under the table, and looked back and forth between the two rather guilty looking women.

Regina and Emma exchanged a look, while the Sheriff finished chewing and swallowed her latest bite of meatloaf, "I know you're worried that something bad is going to happen, but I promise your mom is just helping me with my powers. You know I can't control it so well yet."

Henry let Emma's words sink in, and he nodded in understanding.

"I know it bothers you, Honey, but it's not what you think. I'm not going to corrupt Emma and we were practicing the finest degree of light magic," Regina leaned forward in her seat, imploring Henry while glancing briefly at Emma, whose cheeks had turned red.

"It's just you look kind of upset, and I'm worried. I can't help it," Henry directed his attention to Regina, before looking down and biting his lip.

Her face softened, touched at his show of care, before giving Emma a sultry stare, "Emma and I are getting along better than ever. In fact, she is going to be spending much more time here. Aren't you, dear?"

"Right, so we probably need to revisit that no magic rule in the house and make an exception for me," Emma placed her hands on top of the table and nodded trying to get Henry to go along with it.

"We're also going to need a lot of privacy, and the more intense her magic studies become, and believe me that they will become very intense, she may need to stay here overnight...starting tonight," her eyes bore into Emma's while her lips parted slightly with threatening promise.

Henry cocked his head to the side, as a look of discomfort washed over his face, and he squirmed in his chair, his lips drawn in a tight line.

She shrugged apologetically and rolled her eyes, "We're making magic, kids not meatloaf."

"Precisely, and Emma is very bad at magic, but I plan on sharpening her skills and whipping her into shape in no time," Regina smiled and folded her arms in front of her, "which is why, for your safety, you're going to need to spend quite a bit of time at your grandparent's home."

"But I just got back here to my home, and I don't even have my own room there. Why can't I watch you guys do magic lessons? Maybe I could learn how to do magic too!" Henry huffed and whined, widening his eyes. "You guys wouldn't even be friends if it weren't for me."

Regina licked her lips as she prepared to pull out the big guns, "Henry, do you remember when I said we were planning your birthday? And I know it's not for 8 months but…"

"…And 21 days," he added helpfully.

"Well, yes, and I know it's painfully boring and lacking in fun over at Mary Margaret's, which is why I'm going to get you that One Box X that you want so badly. You can have it now."

"No way! Seriously!" Henry jumped up from the table clearly over the moon.

"Yes, dear, but the condition is it will be delivered and set up over at your dear old grandparent's home, and you can only play with it there."

"Yes! Totally!" Henry ran over and hugged Regina, smashing his face against hers and almost knocking over her chair as he bounced joyously. "Mom, you are the best!"

"I love you, dear. Now, Emma is going to place a call to her mother and inform her of the situation. You should go pack your bags," Regina ruffled his hair and placed a kiss to the top of his head.

"Bribery? Really?" Emma chimed in, raising an eyebrow as Regina regarded her coolly over the top of Henry's head.

"Don't be ridiculous. It's for his safety and well being, seeing as you said yourself you can't control your wild, passionate magic. You don't want your son to suffer a concussion or worse when you launch a lamp across the room by accident, do you?" Henry shook his head in complete solidarity with Regina, and turned to look at Emma while keeping an arm across his mother's shoulder.

"No, I don't want that," she squinted at Regina thinking that she better know what she's doing. On top of sexing the woman up all night and day she was going to have to learn some magic skills just to keep up their thinly veiled cover act. Hopefully, Henry would be too obsessed with his Xbox to even care.

Once they were all the same page and everything was settled, Regina cleaned up from dinner, Henry packed his bags after getting a double promise that the Xbox would be ordered first thing in the morning.

Emma pretended to call Snow, but chickened out. So she just sent a post-it note along with Henry that said, "Kid will be staying with you, I'm gonna be staying at Regina's. Heart, Emma."

Emma was nervous and doubtful once again. What if she couldn't please Regina? She did have some demanding standards. She worried about her performance. She told herself to let it go and let Regina take the lead. She had no problem bossing her around. Emma felt a plume of arousal tingle at that thought. While it was true that she should be sated as she did have five orgasms already, she had never felt needier. She wanted Regina like Henry wanted that Game console. The Queen was like a drug and Emma was a very happy addict. She knew they would be just fine, as long as there were no more interruptions.


	19. One Down

Emma took a deep breath and opened the closet to choose the perfect sex toy for Regina's first orgasm. After much debate she picked up something called "The Underwater Adventure Kit." She read the package as she stepped back into the bedroom to find Regina outstretched on the bed resting the back of hand over her eyes.

"Ok, so if you don't want this one, we have plenty to choose from, but this one has the Dinglehopper, the Thingamabob, oh- the Octopussy, but I think that's for men. At least, I think… Hmm, here's an interesting one: King Triton's Trident. Though I don't know where you put the third prong, but I'm sure I can work with it," Emma rambled on as she inspected the various toys, feeling their texture and turning them over in her hands. "Ooh, check out The Flounder, the fins flap at the speed of a hummingbird's wings. How about that?"

"Emma…"

"Yes?"

"I don't want any of those right now."

"Okay, that's cool- save them for bath time, gotcha. I'll keep looking. I already used the black one, but if you had your eye on it, I think there is a bottle of sanitizer under the box of edible massage oil so I can dig that out and wipe it down."

"No, I just want you," Regina insisted, removing her hand from her eyes and looking up. She looked weary, sleepy and obviously sexy as hell. "Come here. Just you, put your toys away."

Emma understood her sentiment immediately, as she had to agree that she just felt more alive and whole when they were together and touching. She licked her lips and her nervousness melted away as she crawled into bed beside Regina. The brunette's eyes slid shut and she took a long deep breath to center herself.

"Now that you mention the sanitizer, you understand that you will be in charge of the care and maintenance of the whole collection," Regina turned her head and peeked at her through one eye.

"Right add it to my resume: Emma Swan keeper and defender of the Queen's sex toys," Emma checked to see that Regina smiled at this, and after only a second of hesitation she reached out for her and wrapped her arms around her to pull her close.

Regina snuggled back on instinct, resting her head on Emma's chest and relaxing her body. The blonde felt the other woman's breath puffing against her collar bone, and she rubbed circles aimlessly on the her back.

"I can't believe we shipped Henry off to Snow's, and that you promised him an Xbox. He already has a Playstation 4, and a Nintendo 3DS. He's so spoiled," Emma spoke in low tones just so Regina could here. Only the bedside lamp was on, and the room space felt so intimate. The bed was so comfortable and having Regina cuddled up beside her felt so right.

"He's my little Prince," Regina sniffed and burrowed tighter against Emma, inhaling the scent of her skin.

"He's going to be your little Prince in video game rehab if you're not careful." Emma yawned, her chest rising as she inhaled deeply.

Regina pinched her side lightly, and with no hint of anger said, "Don't you dare fall asleep on me."

Emma was quiet for a moment, and then she spoke softly and seductively, "So do something to keep me awake."

She braced herself for an acerbic barb along the lines that Regina was not there for her entertainment, but instead the brunette lifted her head and placed a soft kiss to her lips. Emma kissed back, pushing forward to capture her lips, pulling Regina more firmly against her body. She twisted in her arms to get leverage, and tilted her head to deepen the passionate kiss.

Emma felt her spine tingle as they kissed; she was a bona fide Regina addict and getting her fix. Conscious of the fact that Regina was currently in the throes of an agonizing slow and painful death by way of sex deprivation, Emma deftly unbuttoned her blouse without breaking the kiss. She pulled it open and off of Regina's shoulders, and then pushed Regina down on her back meeting no resistance.

Emma licked her lips and made short work of her own shirt, popping off her bra as quickly as she could and straddling Regina's waist. She searched her eyes and found no sign of impatience. The only rush was blood singing in her ears. Leaning down to slide her hands around her ribcage, she unclasped her bra, worked it over her arms and tossed it aside. She leaned back and admired her handiwork, brushing her fingers over Regina's stomach and nimbly unbuttoning and unzipping her slacks. She slid her hand down and rested it on her center, stroking lightly. Regina circled her hips already trying to get more pressure, stifling a low whimper. Emma withdrew just long enough to move back and tug her pants off, leaving her writhing in only her black panties.

Tugging off her jeans, Emma stepped out of them unhurried, while Regina watched quietly. The need to have them both naked caused her to brace her knees and hands on the bed, and bend down to nip playfully at Regina's hipbone before biting the waistband of the fabric and tugging hard while Regina lifted her hips and Emma worked them down her legs and off using only her teeth.

Regina bit her lips, the edges turning up into a delighted smile. She bent her knee and watched Emma approach, once again straddling her and descending on her pressing their bodies together fully. They kissed with teeth and tongue, Emma needled herself between Regina's legs and rolled her hips in a hypnotically rhythmic motion. The brunette raked her nails lightly up Emma's back, tangling her fingers in her hair and scratching at her scalp.

Emma broke their kiss and planted a peck on the tip of Regina's nose. She then worked her mouth along her neck, as Regina's head lolled back giving her full access. She licked at the shell of her ear and sucked on her earlobe. Finally, going lower, kissing around her clavicle. Regina lifted her arms above her head and sunk lower, letting her be pleasured, her eyes were shut and her mouth was open as she whispered encouraging breathy sounds that drove Emma wild. Everything fell away except the feel and heat of Regina's body, trembling and moving erotically. Emma's sole purpose in life seemed clearly to be pleasing the woman beneath her. She caught Regina's eye and held it as she greedily sucked roughly on her hard nipple, causing her to cry out her name. She gave the other breast equal treatment, lathing her tongue over her sensitive breasts over and over again.

She couldn't wait another moment, and she grabbed at her ass, wedging herself firmly between her hips and Regina instantly parted her thighs as Emma went further down her body. She placed one hand on her inner thigh, feeling the muscles quiver deliciously.

She placed a kiss just to the right of her sex, and Regina inhaled sharply, her whole body tensing in anticipation. Emma licked her lips as she looked at her, fascinated by her beauty and the scent of her arousal. She smelled earthy and sweet like warm weather rain. Emma slid her fingers to part Regina's swollen lips and looked unabashedly at the sticky slick strings of wetness between them. She leaned forward, breath coming in hot puffs, and kissed her pussy, letting her lips press into her deeply, and then running her tongue slowly around her sensitive entrance to taste everything and engulf her senses in Regina's essence.

Ever so slowly she licked upwards softly over the dark pink slick strip, and flicked her tongue against her clit, then flattened it and wrapped her lips around the bud. Regina went crazy, thrashing her legs and bucking her hips. She cried out a loud shattered sound and peppered the air with affirmations and pleading, "Yes, more, God, Emma, please, please, yes."

Emma obliged, sucking her clit nonstop as thighs clapped around her head and Regina pushed against her face. She slid a finger inside finding her walls tightening and clenching around her digit. The blonde held on for the ride as Regina came in a long rough jerk. She tugged her hair and sunk wholly into her while the thrumming drone of magic heated and sparked in the air. Her body finally received its long withheld release with a loving gush of gratitude.

When she quieted and her legs flopped down on the bed in satisfaction, Emma nuzzled her thigh and placed a final kiss there. She stretched out next to her and Regina immediately rolled in to nestle against her side. Her hands stroked her sweat slicked sides and leaned up to kiss her, her eyes hooded and relaxed. Exhaustion took hold and Emma kissed her shoulder, whispering, "You are beautiful," as Regina smiled in satisfaction and closed her eyes to find sleep. Emma thought before drifting off that giving this woman thirty more orgasms would her dream come true.


	20. Heel and Hoe

Through the dark mist of sleep, Emma felt content and warm. Her eyelids fluttered as she reluctantly opened them to find Regina hovering above her. Her body protested the early hour and she pulled Regina down on top of her. "What's up?" She mumbled through her grogginess.

"Wake up."

It was far too early, and her eyes burned from lack of sleep. Her body was so deliciously sore from overuse of muscles she hadn't worked in a long time. She recalled the previous day of activities and her cheeks heated automatically.

"No, we just fell asleep," Emma turned from her back to her side, pulling Regina fluidly with her. She felt kisses dot her cheeks and eyelids and then far too cool air as Regina untangled herself from the blonde's teddy bear embrace and the sheets were unceremoniously ripped away, exposing her.

"You've had five solid hours. It's time to get up and shower…with me," Regina teased as Emma's eyes popped open fully and she took a look at the clock on the nightstand which read 5:30am.

"Oh," Emma sat up, and popped her neck with a wince.

"Don't heel and hoe, dear. Join me at once, and bring the thingamabob," the naked brunette had already plodded halfway across the room and disappeared through the doorway of the bathroom.

Rubbing her eyes, but unable to shake her grogginess. Emma stood up on unbalanced feet and stumbled toward the closet. Digging around for a bit, but dutifully finding the corkscrew shaped Thingamabob toy and licking her lips as curiosity overwhelmed her when she heard the turn of the facet and the rush of the shower water. She couldn't really remember what day it was. Saturday she assumed, therefore no reason to be up at the ass crack of dawn.

She hesitated for a minute, before turning the door handle and entering the already tropically steamy bathroom. She could see Regina's perfect silhouette through the glazed glass of the shower stall, and she woke up a bit more, as she inhaled the warm mouthwatering scented air. Without hesitation she easily slid the glass door open just wide enough for her to step into the stall.

Regina was slippery, soapy and irresistible. Emma stood directly under the hot spray letting it beat down on her tight shoulder muscles, reveling in the immediate relief she felt as tension slipped away. Regina unabashedly looked her over, ever predatory while squeezing a dollop of sweetly scented gel out onto a wash cloth, working it into a white bubbly lather and transferring it onto Emma's chest.

They stepped into each other's arms, Regina grabbing her by the shoulders, and Emma wrapping her hands around Regina's waist to press their stomachs together, soap clinging and frothing between them. The water was just a tad too hot, and Emma's chafed intimate regions stung lightly reminding her of yesterday's orgasms and arousing her to a new level.

"Mmm, refreshing," Regina tilted her head up and kissed Emma's wet supple lips, smiling as she pulled back slightly, stroking at water darkened blonde locks.

Emma pushed into the touch and hummed in agreement and sniffed the air again, "Is that Garnier Fructis?"

Regina didn't answer, she merely rolled her eyes and let her actions speak for her as she palmed the blonde's back and grabbed at her hips, silky smooth skin rubbing everywhere. She pulled gently easing backwards in the confined space until Regina's back was against the tiled wall. The brunette grabbed Emma's hand that held the toy that she had all but forgotten she was holding onto. She looked at it and then looked up at the Sheriff a mischievous smirk on her lips, admitting, "I've never actually had the pleasure of a vibrator before."

"Oh, well technically this is a dildo, not a vibrator," Emma replied like an idiot, her mind was far too focused on the sensation of their heated wet breasts and bellies sliding against one another. Regina seemed carefree, seductively and notably chill, but her patience seemed to be withering. Her hips were churning in earnest, but finding no relief.

"Make it buzz with your magic," she insisted with a nod and in a tone that was half whisper, half whimper. Regina put her hands over her head, her ribcage expanding, her breasts lifting as her eyes slipped shut and her head rested against the stall.

"I can't do that. I don't know how," Emma frowned, she needed intense focus to use her magic, and there were so many erotic Regina distractions in the shower she just wanted to soak it all in so to speak.

"I don't like to be told 'no' as you well know," Regina's eyes snapped open giving her a hard look. She dug her nails into Emma's forearm and commanded, "Do it!"

Emma huffed and puffed and gripped the thingamabob tightly as she strained to impart her will into the dildo. It vibrated weakly, like it was gasping for air. Regina searched her eyes and leaned forward grabbing Emma's head with both hands and kissing her with passionate intent. Instantly the toy came to life like a fish out of water vibrating so hard that it made Emma's whole hand go numb and she dropped it.

Regina exhaled in wonder, "You did it!"

"Damn," Emma drawled, forgetting about the toy and pushing Regina hard into the wall, crashing their lips together to get more of that yummy evil sugar. Regina broke the kiss, anxious for her first taste of the vibrator. Emma decided not to mess around anymore, sensing the Mayor's impatience, she bent down and the retrieved the toy that was still vibrating wildly.

"Good, dear, but perhaps dial it back a touch?" Regina lifted her eyebrows giving her a knowing look that clearly said, 'I value my clit more than I value your life.' Emma concentrated, and the vibration slowed to a more pleasing cadence. She kissed Regina's neck, licking water from her clavicle, and let her hand wander down the flat plane of her stomach, where Regina eagerly widened her stance, bracing her hands on Emma's shoulders so she didn't fall. Emma found slick wetness foreign from the water of the shower as she brushed the tips of her fingers back and forth causing Regina's chest to heave with shallow excited breaths.

She replaced her fingers with the toy, brushing just the head of it softly against her, pausing at her tight entrance and giving her a little bit more pressure. Regina's mouth opened and her eyes widened at the sensation, her hips pushing into it and then pulling away as if she was uncertain as to which felt best. Her hands clutched tighter at Emma's shoulders, signaling she wanted more. Emma's face shook and she breathed out slowly, trying to keep control of the vibrator so it didn't go off the rails, while keeping her ever mounting arousal in check. It was nearly impossible to do with Regina so close to her body, making that face of sheer euphoria as she sweetly humped the thingamabob. Emma turned it up a bit, pushing the corkscrew shaped magic vibrator into her and twisting it as she licked her lips hungrily.

Liking the increased volume of Regina's whimpers and moans, Emma didn't want her to finish too quickly. Regina was leaning heavily on her, her knees having buckled long moments before, and it was all she could do to cling and pump her hips and try to hang on amidst the rapidly building orgasm threatening to spill over at any second.

Emma never wanted it to end she wanted to keep Regina on edge and in the moment, forever pushing into her tight heat. She loved her acting all needy in the private, shielded world of the steamy shower. The blonde increased her pace despite herself, pulling the toy out all the way, slamming it in, as Regina screamed in approval. She pulled it out once more, and pressed it directly to her clit, and half a second later, Regina was cumming and clawing at Emma's back, while she wrapped her up in a big wet hug and kissed her temple to soothe and gently bring her back to herself.

Emma's own sex throbbed in need, but Regina now resembled a smiling spaghetti noodle and in no position to reciprocate, the thingamabob was still buzzing and with no, 'no touching yourself' rule currently in place Emma took matters into her own hands, and just as she figured it only took a minute for her to quake shakily while Regina burrowed tightly against her and the water ran cold.

Heaving a sigh of contentment that orgasm number two had been knocked out along with a bonus magic lesson Emma yawned and asked, "What's for breakfast?"


	21. Oatmeal

"Wow," Regina breathed out in a rasp, her eyes were wide as her wet skin cooled and she shivered lightly. Emma hopped up from the shower floor and brought them each a fluffy soft towel from the rack. She reverently wrapped up Regina and helped her to her feet, and Regina rewarded her with a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks," Emma blushed, feeling more than pleased. She mentally high fived herself: Two down, twenty-nine to go. This whole thirty-one orgasm thing was going to be a cake walk. She tried to calculate how long it was take them to finish, but she was not yet familiar with Regina's particular appetite. Five a day seemed reasonable if she was allowed to spend more overnights, and that would take less than a week. She suddenly got sad, what if Regina only wanted her for the thirty-one orgasms and then she was done with her? Maybe she should make them last, but the whole 'withholding' thing didn't work out so well last time.

"Come to the kitchen, we have a whole agenda today," Regina seemed to be making a mental list, distracted as she dried herself, and stepped out into her bedroom. "Provided you are mine for the day?"

"I'm yours," Emma grinned like a bastard, then looked down at her towel clad body "I don't have any clean clothes here. Can you teach me how to magic some up?"

"That's a lesson for another time. There's something I want to show you regarding your magic lessons during this…special time. For now, you can pick something out of my closet. I hate to admit this, but I do have a couple outfits that belong to you in my wardrobe."

"Do I even ask why you have my clothes?"

"Remember when you got sucked into the portal?"

"Which time?"

"Right after the curse broke," Regina crossed the room and pulled underwear for herself out of her top drawer.

"Which curse?"

"My curse. Do follow along," she retrieved a blouse and slacks as from her closet as Emma continued to drip water on the floor around her.

"Yeah, I remember."

"Well, I may have…borrowed a few of your outfits while you were…away."

"Borrowed, but never returned?" Regina looked indignant, but slightly guilty.

"Why?"

"Ugh, you sound like Henry. So many questions," Regina tried to deflect so she wouldn't have to give a straight answer. She fidgeted with the buttons on her blouse as she quickly dressed.

"Just one, actually," Emma held firm as she waited with her hands on her hips, the towel carefully folded around her.

"As I recall you stole my blue silky blouse the first day you were in town."

"Fair enough, but still why did you feel the need to take my clothes? Retribution for me taking your shirt hardly seems your style when you never thought that I'd come back."

Regina breathed out and rolled her eyes, "I was trying to figure out how to get you back and I thought maybe if I had something that belonged to you I could track you with a locator spell."

"Uh huh. Maybe you secretly love my outfits, but can't bring yourself to buy a nice ensemble like mine?"

"No, that's definitely not the case. Would you be satisfied if I told you that I-I missed you?"

"There it is!" Emma smiled and turned to say more, but Regina was already dressed and had left the room.

She picked through the massive closet, only having to move the sex toys slightly in order to reach the racks of clothes, and found her black sweater and a pair of her jeans. She wondered if Regina had actually worn them. She grabbed them off the hangers realizing her panties were still MIA. Feeling mischievous she stood with sweaty palms in front of Regina's top drawer, deciding that yes, she really was going to swipe a pair of the Mayor's panties.

She licked her lips as she slid the drawer open, finding that her under-things were neatly stacked by type and color. Quite a bit of black silky things as she would expect, but also some red lacy things, and some pretty baby blue things…and some hot pink thongy thing... Emma realized with a feeling she couldn't describe that the panties she was currently staring at were hers. Regina had not only "borrowed" her sweater and jeans, but her one pair of pink panties. Apparently, their attraction to each other had gone back a long time and in a slightly creepy way. Well, the attraction had been there from the start with Emma; she just hadn't called it that at the time.

"Tit for tat," Emma mumbled as she left the pink panties and picked out a pair of expensive and French looking panties of Regina's, and slipped them on. She wiggled into her jeans and retrieved her bra before pulling the sweater over her head and went to find Regina in the kitchen.

She decided not to push the women who was currently preparing her breakfast and maybe let her discover her thievery in a more pleasant way.

"What are you making?"

"Oatmeal," Regina replied cheerily, as she stirred something on the stove.

Emma made a face of disappointment when Regina turned her back. Emma ate oatmeal all the time. She could never make it right, always adding either too much or too little water to the oats and cooking it unevenly in the microwave so the outside was dry and sticky or the middle was like nasty quicksand. She shouldn't have worried, for a few minutes later, Regina plopped a bowl of oatmeal in front of her. It was like gourmet oatmeal, perfect texture and temperature, with warm apple slices and cinnamon on top.

"Yum, this is so good," Emma struggled to swallow her overstuffed mouthful.

"Thank you, dear. If you'll excuse me I need to call Henry and make sure he is going to stay at Snow's so we can continue our agenda."

Regina picked up the cordless and stepped out of the room, but still within Emma's earshot:

"Henry, are you awake? Well, you answered. Are you having fun? Oh, yes, we did make some magic…like what spells? Specifically? Um… I don't think I can really discuss it with you at this time…No, nothing dangerous, just…fun...Henry, and do you need anything? Well, yes, I know. I'll have Emma help me order it on the interweb system this morning as soon as we finish breakfast…..No, that's not a shipping option….Henry, I can't just send my flock of ravens to the Amazon warehouse and have them pick up your Xbox…..Well, you'll have it when you have it…Snow is making you rake leaves today and help her with the Neal's baby book? Fine, overnight express, of course, dear…Ok, Hmm?...Oh, Snow, Hello…oh. No, Emma said she talked to you…Post it note? Slow down…. Yes…she's here. Hang on…" Regina reentered the room with a frown and handed over the phone to Emma forcefully.

Emma gulped and held the phone up to her ear, while trying to ignore Regina's crossed arms and scowling face standing over her, "Hey…I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know. I'm sorry. Really sorry. Yeah, I will. Ok. No, it's all ok. I'm sorry."

The blonde pushed the hang up button and let out a long breath. She lifted her eyes guiltily to look at Regina, "Well, that went well."

"You told me you talked to Snow about Henry staying over there."

"I did…I, uh, sent a note."

Regina grabbed Emma's half-finished oatmeal away from her and stomped off to the sink. Emma pushed out her chair and chased after her.

"I wasn't finished eating!"

"You are now, Ms. Swan. I'm adding five more orgasms to what you owe me for lying!" Regina threw the oatmeal into the garbage disposal and flipped the switch as her eyes blazed with anger. Emma was going to learn to stay out of the kitchen entirely because it seemed Regina got particularly angry and/or horny when she was working with food.

"So now I'm your sex Pinocchio? Adding orgasms to my sentence every time I tell a lie?" Emma was more amused than upset, actually she was already thinking of lies she could tell to keep herself as an indentured sex servant to Regina.

Regina nodded and pursed her lips. Her eyes were shining and dangerous, and a blush had crept up her the exposed skin of her chest, "Do you accept you punishment?"

"Gladly," Emma responded immediately, and pushed Regina against the counter to start paying on her debt immediately.


	22. Drop it like it's hot

Regina clawed at Emma's collar, grabbing some shirt and some hair while her nails bit into the skin of Emma's neck. She yanked her head forward to mash their lips together in a brutal kiss. Emma moaned as her body relaxed; a flood of endorphins releasing in a swirl of pleasure and pain. She tasted apple cinnamon on Regina's lips and in that moment everything was right with the world. The memory of their previous encounter in the shower was still fresh in Emma's mind and the way Regina demanded so much from her left her aching with want.

Backing the dark haired woman against the counter, Emma wedged her thigh in between Regina's legs and pushed her whole body into her, gaining leverage as they kissed. Regina had relinquished the hold on her collar in favor holding Emma around the waist, keeping her close as their bodies quickly heated. Emma cradled Regina's face gently ghosting kisses along her lips, and then down her neck, letting hot breath puff over the shell of her ear as she worked her blouse out from the band of her pants and let her hands slither under it, over her stomach and up her back.

Not sure if their verbal sparring was enough foreplay for Regina, or if they just didn't need much as they were rapidly learning how to push each other's buttons in the best and most efficient ways, Emma felt Regina trying to rock herself against her firm thigh, but she pushed her back and kept her still.

"Allow me," she said as she worked open the button of Regina's pants and slid the zipper down all the way. She let her fingers barely dip over Regina's heated center, as if they were shy, while Regina's eyes widened in need and she tried unsuccessfully to buck against Emma's hand.

Finding it frustrating that the blonde was taking her time, opting to pepper kisses over her clavicle and run a sole teasing finger up and down the band of her panties but never touch her where she needed it, Regina unbuttoned Emma's jeans and pushed at the zipper, giving herself just enough room to fit her hand in, pushing past her taut tummy and down directly against her pussy. Emma moaned at the suddenness of the contact, and her eyes flitted back, losing her hold on Regina momentarily. She took it as her opportunity and switched their positions, pulling Emma around and slamming her back into the counter. Her fingers never stopped their movement, up and down, bringing moisture from her entrance up to make her clit slick.

Not to be outdone, Emma stopped playing softball and forced Regina's panties aside, wiggling her index finger into her tight heat, causing Regina to throw her head back and open her mouth in a silent scream. Just as she upped her stroking speed on Emma, letting her fingers dip and dance and spread her pussy in an arrhythmic way, Emma found that it was perfectly pleasurable but she was unable to get something going orgasm-wise as Regina teased her mercilessly. Emma was now set on the direct route, and added her middle finger bending her knees to get even more force behind her thrusts. Regina swallowed, her eyes crossed and her free hand let go of Emma's hip and grabbed tightly at her forearm, as she let out an undignified scream of building pleasure.

"Fuck me," Regina cried, as Emma panted an unintelligible response, that in her mind she was saying, "I am fucking you and you love it," but it just came out as a breathy "love it."

She truly loved every moment of it, her hips were working wildly as Regina had found the good sense to plunge a handful of fingers into Emma's soaked pussy, and they fucked each other in time, wiggling and pressing and plunging in ways that caused sparky bursts to crackle in front of Emma's eyes. Regina slowed her wrist and took a ragged breath, letting her weight slump onto Emma further. Her eyes were half lidded as she announced she was close and that signaled Emma to redouble her efforts.

She found herself close as well, and they rocked greedily into one another, practically stumbling and shaking against the counter where the can opener rattled dangerously close to the edge and Emma was sure her lower back was bruised but she didn't care. Regina bit her neck as she came, sinking her teeth into the tendon at the base. The sudden pain caused Emma to come with a particularly forceful buck of her hips and then her body was twitching as she threw her head back and tried to hold both her and Regina's weight upright.

It took a long moment before either woman could calm down and get their bearings. Their fingers were still twisted inside each other, as they hugged one another tightly. Regina pulled back, frowning at the teeth marks and redness she had inflicted on the blonde's neck, but Emma just smiled and kissed the frown off of her face. Slowly and reluctantly they both slid their fingers free and stepped apart.

Emma loved how Regina looked: so undone, her hair was messy, her face was flushed, her lips swollen with her pants half down her thighs and her shirt unbuttoned. Emma was sure she looked in similar condition. She couldn't see the bite on her neck, but she could feel it. She wondered in wicked amusement if Regina had had all of her immunizations. A Regina-infection would certainly put a damper on her plans. She let her eyes wander lower where her tight jeans had been pushed down her thighs and her sweater was bunched up around her stomach. She felt almost sickly hot and sweaty so she simply pulled the sweater off. Standing in the kitchen in just her bra and open jeans she noticed Regina's eyes were focused on her crotch and Emma lifted an eyebrow.

"Those are mine," Regina ran a finger over the front of Emma's black panties that she had stolen from the dresser.

"Nah uh, these are mine. Clearly, I'm wearing them," Emma's voice smoldered with the promise that this was going to be a fun game they were about to play.

"That's a total lie! Six more orgasms," Regina countered, her voice sounded lilting and playful, "Now give them back."

"Take them if you want them back so badly," Emma braced herself against the counter and leaned back, opening her body up to her. She looked sensuous, like ripe fruit poised for the taking.

Regina licked her lips in a way that could only be described as sinful. She hooked her fingers in Emma's jeans and yanked them down forcefully. Pulling Emma's foot up like a horse hoof and ripping each leg off of her feet. She stood in her plain bra and Regina's black sexy panties, that were slightly tight on her hips, and the bottom half of her ass cheeks hung out exposed. She allowed Regina to move her hands over her ass, kneading as she bit at Emma's bra strap and pulled it down her shoulder so she could readily access her breasts. She kissed and sucked at the sweat glistened skin, blowing cool air over her nipples before sucking one, then the other into her mouth.

"Fuck, I thought you were just taking my panties."

Regina pulled back with a loud wet pop, and looked into Emma's eyes, whispering pointedly, "I'd prefer to make them drop, dear."


	23. Clorox Wipes kill 99% of Germs

Wanting to be completely naked and fully hers, Emma unclasped her bra and indeed made her panties drop, meeting Regina's eyes for approval. She found clear lust looking back at her. She raked her eyes over her body causing Emma to shiver under the scrutiny.

Regina possessively cupped Emma's sex with one hand and squeezed her breast with the other, and with the same unarguable tone said, "Mine."

She pressed her body forward, holding her close and tight, in a lovely hug. It never ceased to amaze Emma that Regina could act all overbearing and in control, and then do something so sweet and sensitive in practically the same breath.

She felt Regina stroke her hair and relaxed into the touch. She was positively floating from the strong sensation of being wanted. It was such a turn on that Regina wanted every part of her. Emma decided then and there that she wasn't going to hold anything back.

She remembered her mission here was to make Regina come more times than she could currently calculate. What was the number up to: 41 or were they down to 39? How many had she had so far? That last time she was pretty sure Regina had squeaked out a second mini-orgasm, did it count as a 1/2? Maybe it had just been a 1/3 of an orgasm. If they were getting into fraction territory, she was going to have to make an excel spreadsheet with a formula to keep a tally.

Not wanting the hug to end, but wanting more than ever to please her, she shifted their positions by grabbing Regina's wrist and spinning her into the counter which culminated in the can opener finally falling off, but neither woman let it steal their focus.

Emma swept Regina's pants off fervently and ripped her panties down her legs, pausing to wrap them around her finger and fling them slingshot style across the room. It was no wonder panties had a tendency to disappear on her.

Using her toned arms Emma easily hoisted the brunette up onto the counter, as she screamed in surprise at the abruptness of the change. She moved her hands around Emma's neck and they kissed as Regina slowly scooted to the edge of the counter, and intently pushed Emma's head down indicating where she wanted her undivided attention.

There was no need to wait or tease at this point. Emma dropped to a squat, fully aware she was naked out in the open layout of the kitchen, but not caring about anything except getting Regina off with her mouth. She pulled at Regina's ass, scooting her even farther forward on the counter until she was lined up just right. She laid a hand on each of Regina's thighs pressing them open fully, and putting the Queen on full display before her.

Then she lapped and sucked and made as much noise as she wanted while Regina twisted and screamed above her. She felt Regina hook her knees over her shoulder's and pull at her head trying to get more and more as she bucked herself into Emma's face at a frantic pace.

Emma couldn't see her, but she could hear her and feel her, and the sensations were overwhelming as she worked her into a delicious frenzy. They were feeling so free around one another, all of the trepidation gone and it had only enhanced their passion and confidence. Emma loved to see Regina acting so delightfully lusty and needy; it was a huge turn on from her regularly uptight and buttoned up self.

It didn't take long for Regina to have another explosive orgasm thanks to the talent of Emma's tongue. Emma kept licking at her until Regina had to reluctantly push her away from the sensitivity.

Pulling her up, she kissed the taste off of Emma's lips, petting her lovingly as she spent a long moment in recovery from her third orgasm of the day and it was still early morning. Emma was dazzled by the shimmer in her eyes and the way she held her body: like a well-fed cat who was about to settle down for a long leisurely nap. It was as if time had turned back and years had been lifted off. If only she could bottle sex as an anti-aging remedy. Maybe Regina knew a spell and they could incorporate it into her magic lessons?

"I want you to stay naked today," Regina stroked her cheek and placed a loving kiss on the spot she had just touched.

Emma leaned into the attention, smiling despite herself, figuring it was useless to do this dance of putting on clothes only to have them torn off over and over. No wonder strippers wore pull away pants.

"I can probably stay naked," she punctuated her remark with a sweet kiss which Regina readily accepted.

"Good, now let's go order Henry his game toy machine before it gets too late," Regina put her arms on Emma's shoulders and hopped off of the counter. She looked around for her panties in puzzlement.

"Guess you should stay naked too," Emma suggested with a teasing smirk and wink. Regina blushed, and then the fact that the kitchen was in disarray dampened her mood momentarily.

Emma sensed her worry, and bent over giving Regina quite an eyeful while she picked up the electric can opener, which had hung itself by the cord and was still dangling over the side of the counter.

Regina fished out a Clorox wipe from under the sink and scrubbed her sweaty ass cheek marks from the marble surface.

"Erm, remind me to clean that again before I cook," Regina ran the wipe over the counter once more, giving a thorough rub down to a much larger radius then either of them had touched just to be certain to kill all of the sex germs.

Still unable to find her panties, Regina simply magicked up a new outfit for herself, ignoring Emma's wish for her to stay naked too.

"I like the act of you undressing me too much, dear. Maybe I should add on some layers to make it last?"

Though it sounded exhausting and tedious, especially when she was hot and bothered and wanted nothing more than skin on skin, but Emma couldn't argue it was rather nice, like unwrapping a hot sultry, expensively wrapped, and lovely shaped present on Christmas morning every time, so she would endure.

Regina found her purse on an end table and pulled out her Visa, handing it over to Emma, "I am hopeless with the internet, and I'm tired of asking Henry to find everything out for me. There are some things I want to look up in private. I need you to give me a technology lesson."

Emma couldn't help but wonder: if 'magic lessons' were code for sex, what was a 'technology lesson' code for? Did Regina want her to show her how to find porn on the internet? Emma felt slightly exposed as they walked down the hallway to the office with the computer. She chuckled calling attention to her nudity.

"Aren't you gonna bring some plastic wrap to cover the surfaces in case I try to sit on anything?"

The brunette licked her lips and flared her nostrils, and her breath quickened, "If you feel the need to sit on something, you're welcome to sit on my face."


	24. Females

"What did you just say?" Emma stopped in her tracks, unable to control the blooming heat that coursed through her at the thought that Regina had just invoked.

"I simply made an offer. You heard me perfectly clear," she sauntered on into the office, "Come here, we have to order Henry's gift. That is, if you want to continue our rendezvous without interruption?"

"Yeah, KK," Emma nodded eagerly and willed her legs to follow her into the office. The computer was a dinosaur, but surely top of the line in 1985 standards. Commodore 64 was emblazoned on the grey top and Emma switched on the power while the beast slowly booted up showing a bright blue screen and then going black.

"You know you can get a nice laptop for like four hundred dollars these days," Emma moved to sit on the chair in front of the computer, and then thought better of it. She looked to Regina for approval.

Regina's tongue darted out for a moment and then her shoulders tensed, "Maybe I should just get you a towel."

Emma smiled as the computer continued to boot, making internal crunching sounds. A moment later Regina returned and placed the folded towel on the seat of the chair, motioning for her to go ahead.

"It's leather," Regina simply said and turned her attention to the screen, as she leaned her arm on the back of the chair.

"Does the internet even run on this thing? I can probably order it on my phone in two seconds," Emma thrummed her fingers on the desk and wiggled the mouse, watching the old dotted hour glass turn in circles as it continued to process.

"This computer is imbued with magic. It just takes a moment and then it's like my mirror, High definition and lightning fast," Regina seemed very proud of it and she patted the honking big ass monitor with fondness.

"Seriously? I had no idea Century Link had a magic internet package. How about your cable bundle? Do you get every channel in every realm?" Emma laughed at the absurdness just as the icons appeared on the screen.

"Google Chrome," Regina uttered with reverence, as she began stroke and knead Emma's shoulders. Her eyes were no longer focused on the computer, but on Emma's torso. She played with her long hair and Emma let her eyes slip shut and sighed softly. Regina let her fingers absently trace down her décolletage and drift lazily back up to her shoulders.

"Please, dear, show me how this works. I want my lesson," Regina murmured in her ear, as Emma tried to regain her focus on the task at hand.

"Okay, ooh, keep doing that," she encouraged as she felt hands lightly massage the back of her neck. "Oh, yeah… well, if you want to watch…whatever you want to watch, you have to know a few things. First, there are some great free sites that have some of everything, but don't click on any of the pop up advertisements, or else you might get a virus or it might incur charges. Second, always clear your browser. To do that you just go up here to 'Tools' and click 'delete browsing history'. See, this shows the history of websites that were visited."

Emma clicked on the browsing history, as Regina licked her cheek and rested her head on her shoulder. She was barely paying attention to anything Emma was saying, and not that she minded. She found it entertaining that having her explain how something worked was apparently such a turn on for the Mayor.

"Oh, what's this? Red tube, You Porn… it looks like your history is already full of porn, and you said you didn't know how to use the internet. How many orgasms do I subtract for when you lie to me?"

Regina looked up and squinted at the screen, "I don't watch porn. I mean I didn't even say anything about porn- you just assumed that's what I would want to use the internet for. I wanted to look up proper care for my mums and hydrangeas through the fall, not- what does that say?" Regina leaned closer, abandoning her massage on Emma's shoulders to read, "Hot and horny teens."

Realization was slowing dawning on Emma, but Regina looked truly befuddled. She gritted her teeth and turned to face the worried brunette, "Um…so Henry uses this computer?"

"Nooo!" Regina screamed, her eyes widening in horror at the thought of her precious little baby angel prince trolling porn on the family computer. She stared off into the distance, a faraway look clouding over her eyes.

"Hey, come back to me," Emma grabbed her arm and held her, pulling her down onto her lap as if she was catatonic.

"Do you think- do you think he's…fornicating?" Regina blinked rapidly willing away the visual images that were flooding her mind, and holding back fallen tears for her child's discarded innocence.

"I don't think that he's doing anything. He's not a baby anymore, and I just had that sex talk with him so I'm sure he's just curious. It's perfectly natural. We should just pretend that we never saw it, and I'll teach him how to clear his browsing history." The blonde rubbed reassuring circles on Regina's back and rocked her softly, not quite sure what else to say. She wasn't pleased about it, but she wasn't having a complete meltdown and jumping to conclusions.

"What if he has an abortion?" Regina started hyperventilating, "Zach had an abortion and Alicia never even knew about it until it came up during oppo research for her State's Attorney campaign."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Emma was fairly certain Regina had fully lost her mind over Henry's little dalliance into the seedy underworld of porn.

"The Good Wife," Regina shook her head, and tried to snap out of it. "That Grace is an angel…why couldn't you have birthed a girl, Ms. Swan?"

"Okay, I suppose this is all my fault," Emma gestured between them, getting anxious as she watched all the hard orgasmic work she had put out that caused Regina relax evaporate before her eyes. The woman was as tight as the tension on a bow. "So we'll have another talk with him: both of us together. It will be awkward, but we should maybe come clean about all the…activities… we've been up to as well. You can't be too upset with him for not telling us about his fascination with porn when we've been so…busy ourselves. Let's just worry about all that later, and we'll order his Xbox."

Emma leaned forward and typed in Amazon, and searched for the Xbox One, "See, you just click 'add to cart'.

Regina broke her seething silence, "He is not getting an Xbox anymore. That is out of the question. He's going to stay at Snow's with no games and no access to porn or… females, until he is 18."

"I think that will just make it worse if we forbid him from…females. He's fine over there, and he's not going to be doing anything with his Grandma's watchful eye over him. Trust me when I say that she has the power to kill any libido instantly."

Regina looked thoughtful, taking everything in and trying to process, "Yes, I suppose spending some more time with your mother is punishment enough."

"Let's forget about it, and remember the important thing here: I'm naked, and you're tense. I think we should work with that. I mean why waste precious time worrying when I could be sitting on your face right now?" Emma was trying to patch a Band-Aid on a hemorrhaging carotid artery, but she was very hopeful that it was working.

"We'll revisit this later, but that reminds me that there is something I've been meaning to show you today: something that will benefit us both," Regina waved her finger in the air as she lifted herself off of Emma's lap. By the pleased look on her face, she was thinking about something quite pleasant.

"What is it?" Emma couldn't even begin to guess. She frowned at the loss of contact from Regina's warm body and leaned in out of curiosity.

"Remember when I said that I don't watch porn? Well, that's because I prefer to read it."


	25. Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magik

Regina grabbed Emma by the hand and pulled her up from the computer chair, yanking her forward two steps, before stopping short and turning back to grab the towel.

Leading her out and down the hall, they stopped at the door of the study. "No one's knows about this. Even Rumple thinks it was destroyed long ago. I don't know why I'm even asking this, but promise me that you can try to keep a secret?"

"I resent the implication," Emma responded crossing her arms, but nodded and agreed that of course she could keep a secret. Though she was a bit fearful at what Regina was going to show her. They entered the room and Regina swung open a picture by the fireplace revealing a secret safe. Emma situated her towel on the sofa and sat down, never taking her eyes off of Regina.

The brunette coughed and looked back, with a side gaze as if Emma was going to memorize the numeric code to open the safe. The air seemed tense while neither woman spoke as she pulled open the thick door and pulled out two books.

Emma cocked her head puzzled. She had seen the purple book with the heart embossed on front. It was Regina's spell book and they had used it to look up various spells many times.

"Your spell book isn't a secret; at least it's not anymore."

"No, this spell book," Regina lightly touched the blood red book as her eyes widened and she stared at it in wonder. "This book is special. It also belonged to my mother, but the spells contained within are different."

"Different like how?" Emma asked, feeling slightly annoyed by the prospect of spending their special sex day reading. If she wanted to do that she'd go find Belle at the library. First, Henry had ruined the mood with his porn by proxy and now Regina seemed to want to start a book club.

"When I was young, I would sneak into Mother's room and sometimes she would leave the book under her pillow. It makes me blush just thinking about it. I felt so naughty and the risk of possibly getting caught was…exciting," Regina's eyes were jetting back and forth as she stroked the cover of the book, lost in memory.

Emma opened her mouth to say something, but realized she valued her life, and she didn't want to be kicked out into the street buck naked so thankfully the filter between her brain and mouth came in handy for once and didn't speak. But she thought it and snickered. Regina was essentially admitting that as a young teen she would look at porn, albeit- her mother's porn, which was pretty weird, but the internet had yet to be invented and they probably didn't have a subscription to Playboy back then so she had to get while the getting was good.

The most ironic part of it was that Regina had just admitted to doing essentially the same thing as Henry. It amused her to no end to imagine Regina doing the rebellious equivalent of smoking cigarettes in the garage while her mother was out getting her hair done.

"So what is that book about that has you acting like to you wanted to fuck it?" Emma did let that slip out, because Regina really was acting like she wanted to make sweet, sweet hot love to that book and frankly it was making her feel unholy jealous. She realized it was ridiculous to be jealous of a book though, so she just crossed her arms and waited for Regina to stop reminiscing in nostalgia land and explain things.

"There were rumors of the things my mother did to get her hands on this book: the hearts she had to rip out and the acts she had to perform. When I discovered it I had no idea what to expect, and I didn't even know magic at the time," Regina whispered with reverence. She moved swiftly across the room, and sat down next right next to Emma to show her the spell book.

She opened up the book, and Emma noticed that it was written in some foreign language, maybe Spanish, but there were odd pictures that she caught glimpses of as Regina flipped quickly through the pages. She stopped on a certain one and brought the book close to her nose and with eager glee, took a hearty inhale like she as snorting cocaine off a hooker's ass. When she looked up her eyes were fiery red and rolling back into her head, her lips were parted and she let out a breathy sigh like she was rapt with pleasure. Emma wanted what she was having, and as she watched, Regina moaned contentedly and slid over on the sofa to rest her head on Emma's lap.

"Are you going to explain this or just use me as a pillow while you take a drug trip?"

Regina murmured incoherently, blowing hot breaths against Emma's stomach as her hair tickled at her thighs, "Are you familiar with the Kama sutra?"

"Yeah, like a guide to different sex positions, right?" Emma wrinkled her nose and moved her hair out of the way, shifting slightly so she could cradle Regina's head. The brunette rolled onto her back, languishing like a cat being petted as Emma stroked her hair. She made a weird drawn out sound, and Emma realized that Regina was giggling, her body shaking and her lips pursed and eyes shut tight.

"Yes, this book pre-dates that. No one knows exactly how old it is, but I have it on good authority that all other copies were destroyed. You see, contained within is dark sex magic that no one has been able to replicate, and it's dangerous unless the user has impeccable control of his or her magic," Regina looked proud of herself as she continued to writhe and smile.

"I thought you can't use magic to make someone fall in love with you?"

"You can't, but lust is another beast altogether. There are spells for everything, some with greater success rates than others. For instance, there's a chapter on powerful curses that can be enacted against another: impotence is the most popular, of course. And conversely, priapism is second popular when it comes to afflicting men with sexual curses. My mother cursed one man to only become aroused by women's feet."

"I never thought about cursing someone with a weird sex fetish, but perhaps if one has a lot of enemies. What made it so dangerous that all the copies were destroyed?"

"One reason is that there is a spell for uncontrollable lust, and sorcerers cursed whole enemy villages with it. Everyone was completely preoccupied having sex to do anything else. It put sex above basic survival and everyone starved or froze because they couldn't stop."

"They literally fucked themselves to death? What about the children?" Emma made a disgusted face as she contemplated the impact of that particular curse.

Regina cleared her throat, and shuddered, "It is best not to think about that… or the animals….those poor, poor animals." She paused for a moment, trying to erase the image from her mind.

"That's not why I am showing this to you now. This book isn't all evil. There are some perfectly harmless, yet extremely pleasant spells that I want to teach you."

With reluctance, Regina heaved herself up from Emma's lap and shifted on the sofa, tucking in beside her, so they could peruse the book together.

"I'm kinda scared now. I don't want to something mess up, and Snow ends up finding just our sex-starved skeletons wrapped around each other on this couch."

"There are much worse ways to go," Regina bumped her shoulder and winked, leaning in to kiss her cheek and pat her thigh.


	26. Wing Dings

Emma grimaced and hoped they wouldn't be crossing that bridge. The look on Regina's face made her worry that perhaps she did plan on enacting some sex revenge magic on Snow, "Um, okay, so let's start off easy. Show me something harmless...yet pleasant."

Regina cracked her knuckles, and then licked her index finger so she could separate the pages of the ancient book with ease. She found a certain page that had a crudely drawn ouroboros, amongst an inverted triangle and little arrows pointing in a circle like the recycle symbol. It looked like Wing Dings font to Emma's untrained eyes:

"Sexual energy is a potent force that can be harnessed to transcend one's normally perceived reality."

"Clear your mind and smell this page," Regina watched her carefully to make sure she lifted the smell off of the correct spell.

Heart pounding in fear, like waiting in line for roller coaster, Emma hoped that this would be fun and thrilling, but part of her couldn't help think about the risk factor. She took a tiny sniff, and felt the book pushed closer to her face impatiently. This time she took a hearty inhalation and she felt her ears pop like she had just risen suddenly in elevation. Her body tingled and she had a moment of light headedness, but other than that she didn't feel any different.

"Oh, it smells like Drakkar Noir," she commented as her nose tickled and she coughed lightly. Frowning she checked her breasts to make sure she still had nipples, and then spread her legs to discreetly check between them: no magic dick." Definitely still a girl. I double checked. I don't have any sexual feelings toward elbows or any other body part over another. So what did it do?"

Regina chuckled as she watched the careful inspection and growing concern spread over the blonde. She made no comment, only took a whiff of the spell page and moved to sit at the opposite end of the sofa. Emma sat up to watch her every move. The book lay shut between them as the spell started to take hold.

"You'll see. Have a bit of patience. I know it's hard. I don't like to be kept waiting either. Sometimes you just have to take matters into your own hands," Regina said far too cheekily for Emma's liking. There was some joke hanging in the air, but Regina seemed to be the only one privy to it.

"What's this spell called anyway?"

"The name roughly translates to 'eat yourself.'"

Emma smacked her lips and tugged her earlobe, "that doesn't sound that appealing actually."

"Close your eyes, dear."

For an all-powerful sex spell book, this one was disappointing so far. Emma figured she would do better reading the sex guide that came with the toys. In fact, Emma decided she might just write her own guide to sex. Just as she was contemplating what that would look like, she felt a soft tickle on her thigh. She opened her eyes to see if Regina had somehow come close, but saw nothing touching her, and Regina was still on the other end of the couch. Her eyes were closed and she was still fully clothed.

She sighed and settled back to the couch, running her hands nervously through her hair and scratching her scalp. She heard Regina murmur contentedly, and her suspicions began to rise. Once again, she felt a touch on her body. This time a warm hand was gliding up her stomach and came to rest between her breasts. She looked down again, seeing nothing, and promptly gasped as she felt a firm pinch to her left nipple. She immediately looked at Regina and sure enough, her hand was conspicuously under her blouse, pinching on her own left nipple.

"Oh my God," Emma breathed out, eyes at attention as Regina unbuttoned and unzipped her own pants and slowly slid her hand in. Emma felt it without delay; it was as if she were being touched by Regina's fingers. Emma spread her legs a bit out of habit in attempt to get more action, even though it didn't matter how she sat, she could feel the touch everywhere. Experimentally, she reached up and cupped her own breasts, squeezing lightly, and watched mesmerized as Regina moaned and arched her back into the phantom touch of Emma's hands.

Regina didn't waste any more time, she began to rub her clit in short concentric circles, and Emma's breath increased as she continued to work at her own breasts as well as Regina's. Emma leaned back into a throw pillow, awed by how real the feelings were and how she was being touched exactly right. Then another thought occurred to her: without warning she swiped her fingers over her clit, and moaned at the doubly intense sensation.

"Oh, yes!" Regina voiced her approval, and scrambled over to Emma's side of the couch, wearing a very naughty and promising expression. In a half second, she had poofed off her clothes and was climbing to straddle Emma's lap. The second they touched all hell broke loose. They could feel everything, and the confusion of who was touching who added to the thrill and sensory overload.

As Regina ground her hips against Emma's lap, she pressed herself forward and began to kiss her neck. Emma was still surprised when she impulsively grabbed Regina's ass with both hands and felt the force her own ass get grabbed. When Regina kissed her, her mind exploded in wonder, feeling both Regina's tongue and lips as well as her own simultaneously.

Emma shuddered in wonder at the phenomenon of giving and receiving pleasure all at once. Both women were already in tune with each other when it came to chemistry and how to make the other feel good, but never had either experienced such perfection in a lover who literally felt and experienced the same.

There was so much to try out and to experiment with, but both were finding it difficult to hold out and keep up with the teasing, finding they were so turned on, they just needed to cum. Emma started to hyperventilate when Regina pulled her body over so they were lined up face to face on the length of the sofa. Breasts and tummy's mushed together sensuously as they kissed and their wandering hands found their way between each other's legs to rub and fuck each other, working them up into a magic fueled frenzy.

Completely in sync, they found a perfect pace, and drove one another toward orgasm. When it hit, Emma couldn't have fathomed the double punch of a dual, simultaneous orgasm ripping through her whole body. If Emma were to describe both of their orgasms, she would characterize what she knew to be hers as fluid and white, a sort of plunging feeling like diving flawlessly into a pool on a hot day: sheer relief. Regina's was different, it was darker and more fiery, like flames flicking and wavering back and forth , like rolling down a hill and spiraling out of control. When combined into one gigantic mind-blowing experience Emma couldn't begin to describe it all. She could just hold on and weather the incomprehensibly pleasurable sex storm.

They continued to caress each other, coming down softly from the craziness of the spell.

"So that's what your orgasm feels like?" Regina sounded stunned as she rubbed Emma's arm, letting her nails rake gently against the freckled skin.

Emma blew out a long breath, and let her eyes slowly open, a smile was now permanently plastered onto her face, "Who you telling? Oh my God. That's one hell of a book! What else we got in there? Maybe we should try that one again!"

Placing a sweet kiss to Emma's lips, Regina stretched her arms over her head and mirrored Emma's wide delighted grin.


	27. Tendencies

"Come here," Regina coaxed patting Emma's thigh to get her to move over on the sofa and spoon her. Emma opened one eye and stretched out, letting a loud yawn escape her lips. She was pleasantly exhausted and slightly hungry, though nowhere near depleted to the point of sex starvation. She willed her limbs to move and began to untangle her legs from Regina's so she could change position on the sofa.

"Uh uh, bring the towel. I don't want any dribbles staining my couch."

Emma rolled her eyes, but obediently grabbed her towel and stationed it under her naked ass, "I don't dribble….What there's no magic spell for making cum stains disappear from fine upholstery in your fancy schmancy book?"

The brunette draped herself around Emma, and let out a satisfied coo, closing her eyes and resting her head on her shoulder, she teasingly replied, "I'm sure there is. The book holds all the secrets of the entire world, but for now: towel."

"What are we going to do next? Will you teach me one? Does that last one count as two orgasms since we doubled up?" Emma's mind was racing and her questions tumbled out one after another like a kid who just found out she was headed for a surprise trip to Disneyworld. She shivered as the sweat dried on her skin and surprisingly Regina uncoiled a wisp of purple magic and poofed a blanket out of thin air which wafted down to cover them both.

"First a cat nap, then lunch, and then we'll have another magic lesson, if it pleases you," Regina spoke huskily and Emma was sure she could listen to that voice and have her warm body curled up next to her forever and be a very happy camper.

She reached over and picked the magic book up from where it had fallen on the floor. Positioning it on her chest so both women could see the book, Emma flipped through the pages looking for pictures that seemed interesting, "What's this one for?"

The crudely drawn picture showed a pyramid of super horny looking bunny rabbits. Regina squinted at the foreign text, raising her head slightly to see better and read it, "Fertility spells…and infertility spells. These are also very dangerous. They were very popular forms of revenge where I'm from. See this spell can determine the sex of the unborn, and this spell can change it."

"Did you ever use any of those types of spells?" Emma asked cautiously as she smoothed strands of raven hair over Regina's ear.

"Yes, but I was foolish and didn't know what I was doing back then. I took possession of this book after I…sent my mother away and married the king. I didn't want to bear a child for him," Regina spoke with a faraway look in her eye as if she wasn't speaking of her younger self, but someone else entirely.

"Oh, did you do an infertility spell?" Emma swallowed, feeling a bit taken aback by the candidness of Regina's words. She slung one arm under Regina's back and pulled her closer to her side, and felt pleased when the woman next to her answered with a sigh of approval.

"No, I didn't perform any curse on my own person that would be of permanent effect. I performed a spell on the King," Regina smiled wickedly and turned the page, and pointed to an illustration of a limp, depressed looking penis.

"What's it like a magical vasectomy?" Emma asked turning her head slightly to study the image.

"No, that's on page forty-two. This spell makes a man completely disinterested in sex altogether. The king put all of his vigor into watching jousting."

"Aw, I've heard of that spell. Here we call it NFL Sunday ticket," Emma nodded jokingly, "Say, maybe we should get Henry that Xbox. It will keep his little curious hands busy and keep him off of the internet."

Regina tensed in Emma's arms and her eyes widened as an idea formed in her mind, "Maybe I should use magic to make him disinterested in girls…"

"Regina, that is so wrong. I mean I understand you doing that to the King cause I'm sure he was old and gross, and you weren't interested in sex with him, but Henry doesn't deserve that. He's young and fertile and he hasn't had a chance to force anyone into marrying him yet," Emma realized that statement didn't sound right at all. "I mean hopefully, he'll never force anyone into marrying him…."

"I'd undo the spell when he turned eighteen or so," Regina tried to negotiate as it seemed to be a very reasonable solution to her. "Or temporary blindness so he's not tempted by the beauty of women."

Weighing the options, Emma raised an eyebrow as she thought about how nice it would be to not have to worry about some girl crushing her son's heart, "That is tempting, but what happens when you lift the spell and he's eighteen and he doesn't have any experience? He'll get eaten alive. Or...or he'll just turn gay. Hey, did you put a spell on me to make me disinterested in men so you could have your wicked way with me?"

"I wish I would have had the gumption, so I could have had you sooner, but no, your lesbian tendencies are all your own, just as my proclivities are mine."

"Actually, my lesbian tendencies are all yours and yours are all mine."

"I'm not sure what that means, but I suppose that just this time you may be right about Henry…maybe I can find something in here that's a bit less intrusive and drastic?" Regina flipped through the pages again, bringing the book closer to her face and practically shutting Emma out.

Emma placed one hand over the book to get Regina's attention, while lightly scratching her side with the other, "Let's not worry about Henry right now. Why don't you show me some other ones that maybe you and I could do to hone our lesbian tendencies?"

"Very well, but only if you stop saying the word 'tendency'," Regina rolled her eyes and some of the tension seeped out of her body. Emma was starting to get better at calming her down, and she was quite proud of herself for it.

Regina continued flipping through the book, "This spell is the opposite of being disinterested in sex: it makes it so it's all one can think about. This one also can make a man last for days without stopping, and comes with a tantric spell for giving an incredibly long orgasm."

"Wow, it's like a recipe book and the orgasm is like an optional dipping sauce. So if I give you a super long orgasm does it count as more than one off of debt? Like if you have a thirty second long orgasm and I-"

"It's a form of torture, dear. Along the same vein of you withholding my release for ages," Regina interjected into Emma's ruminations about orgasm length.

"Hey, that wasn't entirely my fault, we were interrupted, and I'm paying you back."

"Yes, you are," Regina smiled and leaned in to kiss her sweetly. The more orgasms she had the nicer she became. It was fact. "Now, I think we should have something to eat. You need to keep your strength up for what I have planned for your testing."

"Um, testing? No one mentioned testing."

"Well, then it's a pop quiz. We're going to push your magic skills to the limit!"


	28. Zak and Wheezie

Emma sat at the dining room table, her towel underneath her ass, naked, eating homemade macaroni and cheese with a spoon the size of a shovel.

"Slow down, I know you're eager to continue our magic lessons, but we have all day," Regina said, eating her smaller portion with a much smaller spoon.

"I have to carb up, and this is delicious," Emma gestured at the rapidly disappearing bowl of cheesy goodness with her over-sized spoon and hefted another load into her mouth. She was somewhat afraid that she would do something to piss Regina off and she'd take her bowl away before she was finished. She hadn't forgotten her oatmeal that went down the garbage disposal.

"You seem more excited about that mac and cheese than you do about me," Regina pouted in a teasing manner, and looked pointedly under the table to make sure that the towel in place. She never thought she'd be sitting at her table wearing nothing but a white apron and eating mac and cheese with Emma, who was also naked except a cloth napkin draped across her lap.

"You made me this food so I'm definitely more excited for you, but it's a close race. What are we going to do after lunch?" The blonde scraped the spoon around the inside of the bowl, making sure to scoop every bit of cheese onto it before finishing it off with a hearty smack of her lips.

"We are bringing the toys back. We haven't had nearly enough use of them, do you agree?" Regina batted her eyes and rose from the table clearing their plates. When she moved to closer to get Emma's, she couldn't help but give Regina's cherry bomb booty a smack. The smack resulted in a startled yelp and a glare, but when Regina turned away she smiled widely and bit her lip. To Emma it was worth it, as it wasn't an ordinary occurrence to have someone make her homemade macaroni and cheese using five different kinds of cheese, and bacon plus be served by that someone naked. It also wasn't an ordinary occurrence to spend a whole day doing lesbian magic sex spells, so she deemed the occasion special and thus deserving of not only one, but perhaps several cherry bomb booty smacks.

"Toys, right...Yes, anything you want. Shall we go back up to the bedroom?" Emma had spaced off for a moment, but was brought back to the conversation when visions of macaroni noodles and Regina's shapely ass finely popped in her thought bubble.

"I think I'd like it if you brought them down here," Regina's eyes glinted wickedly as if she had some grand plan that Emma wasn't yet privy too.

"Okay, sure I can go get them—all of them? It's going to take me awhile to bring them all down," Emma scratched her head and frowned looking up at the staircase.

"You'll bring them down using magic. It's part of your lesson. Watch and learn," Regina pushed out her hand and circled her wrist, squeezing her fingers in the air, one eyebrow raised and she wore a look of dire concentration. Her hand shook lightly and Emma turned her gaze from Regina to the staircase. One by one a parade of all different shaped and sized sex toys were floating single file down the curved staircase. They floated across the foyer and with remarkable control they came to rest in a neat line at the end of the dining room table.

"Now it's your turn, bring down the rest. You have to will them to move and imagine the dildos are as light as dandelion seeds floating over a meadow in a soft breeze," Regina crossed her arms and nodded her head in encouragement.

Emma let out a laugh picturing an explosion of sex toys being carried off by the wind in a meadow. She stifled herself when Regina frowned and quickly stood up, "Okay, okay. I've got this."

She let out a few breaths through her mouth and focused and focused her energy. Extending her hands as she had watched Regina do, she imagined the sex toys rising from their boxes and let her magic go as if she was casting a fishing line. She closed her eyes and felt her magic lasso each toy and pull them up into the air. She shook and huffed from the effort, but she kept her focus and sure enough the toys came bopping and floating down the stairs. Of course, they weren't in a perfect line nor were they moving at a consistent pace, but she was using her magic and it was working.

Lining them up on the table was another story, they sort of flailed and fell, dildos and vibrators and packets of lube fluttered and landed heavily knocking the other toys over. Emma was downright gleeful and Regina seemed halfway impressed.

"Hey, look what came down along with the toys," Emma picked up her pair of panties that had been AWOL for almost a whole day.

"Imagine that," the brunette couldn't smile at the proud look Emma sported as she was reunited with her panties.

"So which one did you want to try?" Emma perused the wide selection of varying toys: long, fat, thin, textured, smooth, and plastic, glass, silicone…the varieties went on and on.

"I was thinking we would hold a little race: do you think you can use your magic to make them vibrate?" Regina asked in deadly serious tone.

"Um…probably. No, totally," Emma stuck out a finger and said 'zap' as she pointed at a toy that looked like a sea cucumber and was labeled "Big Blue." It spasmed in an epileptic fit briefly and then fizzled out, thudding like a spinning quarter onto the table.

"Try again, dear," Regina coaxed. Somehow it only took a word of encouragement from her mentor and Emma had Big Blue humming and dancing in no time.

Regina stuck all of the toys on end, and moved them into a line, or rather more like the start of 5k with layers of racers, "Now you're going to make them all go at once, and the first one to fall off the other end of the table is the lucky winner."

It was quite a lesson plan, but Emma was game. She had her eye on one particular vibrator that was very shiny and almost translucent. It seemed to sparkle, and if she was a betting woman she'd go all in on that horse. Summoning her magic, she rolled her neck side to side and stretched her shoulders, bringing her hands over the table; she waited for Regina to wave the starting flag. She nodded and Emma forced her magic to encompass all the toys on the table, making them all buzz and shake out of gate, so to speak. They came to life and started slowly creeping across the table, but it was a short lived race as the super long double ended dildo immediately fell over and rolled quickly down the table and off on the floor.

"Well that was quick," Emma's hands fell to her side and the toys immediately stopped falling and rolling this way and that.

Regina retrieved the red, nubby toy from the floor and held it up to examine the victorious winner. A frown crossed her face as if she was perplexed, "What do we do with this?"

"That wasn't really a fair race. I didn't even use magic to move that one, it just fell over and rolled," Emma made a face. "I guess we could go at it 'Requiem for a Dream' style."

"What does that mean? And what does one call this thing?" Regina held it in the middle and tried to bend it to test for flexibility, and then held one end shaking it so it flopped back and forth. "It's very durable."

"It's a double-ended dildo…Um, I could describe the position, but I'm not sure you'd be into it…"

"Oh, I see. Very interesting…Well, it is the winner, despite how it managed to win. Now that you've mastered floating and vibrating, there's a spell I want you to try while we…maneuver this double-ended dildo."

Emma blushed, "I wouldn't say I mastered anything, but I'm willing to try whatever you have in mind. I like that spell book. Is it another scratch and sniff spell?"

"No, I want you to use this on me while you suspend both of us above the table. It's called a gravity displacement spell," Regina licked her lips and with a flick of her wrist she cleared the other toys off of the table, stacking them in a pile on one of her dining room chairs.

"I'm supposed to suspend us? I know I'm strong and you are skinny, but I don't think I can hold us both up and…maneuver that dildo. At least, I don't think I can do it in any way that either of us is going to enjoy," the blonde looked at the table and then at Regina, finally letting her gaze settle on the dildo.

"Strength has nothing to do with it; it's your magic that will hold us up. Trust me, when done correctly it will be very beneficial for both of us. Now, I don't care for the word 'dildo.' it takes me out of the mood, so perhaps you can think of a euphemism for this thing?"

"Like how I refer to my vagina as 'Lucy'? I love Lucy," Emma grinned immaturely, rocking back and forth trying to think of a good name for the red double ended dildo. "It sort of looks like a dragon…what if we call it the two-headed dragon?"

"You really named your vagina 'Lucy'?" Regina absently smacked the two-headed dragon against her palm as she strutted around the table and untied her apron, pulling it over her head.

"Sure, haven't you named yours?" Emma shrugged like it was totally normal, and watched Regina as she tilted her head in thought. Her eyes automatically roamed over her nakedness with an appreciative nod.

A look crossed passed over Regina's face as if she had a wicked idea, matching Emma's gaze she took her own long look at the woman in front of her before saying, "You will refer to mine as 'Her Majesty.' Now before we begin any spells, or involve the two-headed dragon, you may bow before Her Majesty."


	29. Good old fashioned fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you so much for all the great reviews and support for this story. I must give a loud shout out to my hilarious friend Scribb1es for coming up with the best part of the last chapter: 'Her Majesty.' I was going to have Regina name her vajayjay 'Shmoopy' or something a lot less clever so that was all her idea.

There was something about being quietly bossed around made Emma's back straighten automatically, as she licked her lips. Regina was standing regally, her hands posed on either side of her hips; one leg was slightly forward as if she was a model on the Price is Right showcasing a set of precious gems.

They looked into each other's eyes; Regina's gaze was cool and collected: her cheekbones prominent and her lips drawn in a tight line, daring her to obey. A flicker of excitement ran down the blonde's spine as she dropped dutifully to her knees, and asked again for permission using only her wide eyed expression.

Regina nodded and leveled her stance, "If you do as you did to that macaroni and cheese to me with half the enthusiasm Her Majesty is definitely in for a treat."

Emma slowly placed her palms on Regina's upper thighs and shimmied closer on her knees. Regina stayed locked in position, but she inhaled sharply as she felt Emma's fingernails rake up and down her thighs, tickling and priming her for more contact. Emma bent all the way over, starting with a light kiss to Regina's ankle and then dotting her calves, alternating back and forth between her legs and letting her hands stroke along the smooth skin, following the path of her roving lips.

The sight was one Regina intended to ingrain in her memory forever. Emma's hair was unruly and wild, gliding over her muscled, symmetrical back and the cute little dimples on either side of her low spine. Regina watched her perfectly rounded butt as she felt the swooping touch of Emma's lips and fingers gliding ever upwards on her body. When Emma nuzzled her inner thigh and kissed the skin there, Regina was biting her lip to keep from begging for Emma to show much needed attention to Her Majesty.

Regina busied herself by playing with Emma's hair, piling the thick mass atop her head and out of Regina's line of sight so she could see exactly what that pretty mouth was doing. Emma applied the lightest pressure to Regina's outer lips, grabbing her ass as she did so. Immediately, Regina's hips bucked forward as she slammed her hands down on the table behind her and she whimpered pitifully. Emma smiled victoriously, she may be the one on her knees, but she enjoyed the immense power she had over Her Majesty.

The brunette had her head thrown back, one hand holding herself up on the table, the other hand thoughtlessly pinching her own nipple, as she stood knees forward arching on the tip of her toes. Her whole body coiled with tension as Emma kissed and softly nipped at Her Majesty. She pushed in closer, inhaling her sharp scent and licking a long slow trail pushing her tongue in and applying the much sought pressure that Her Majesty was craving.

"Oh, Emma, Yes!" Regina verbally encouraged between trembling with pleasure and the wordless noises that escaped her lips. When Emma circled her tongue around and then sharply sucked Her Majesty's tiny crown jewel, Regina lost her shit and hissed ungracefully, as her knees buckled while Emma remained committed to wringing every last drop of pleasure out of Regina's orgasm, holding her up and pushing her back against the table. Regina's face was rosy and a shiny layer of sweat had glossed her shoulders and chest. Emma stood up as Regina fell back on the table spent. She didn't miss a beat climbing on top of her and straddling her hips.

"That was fantastic," Regina breathed reaching for Emma and pulling her down for a languid yet passionate kiss.

"Is Her Majesty satisfied?" Emma chuckled and smiled; her eyes bright and welcoming as she gazed into Regina's amber orbs.

Regina quirked an eyebrow and sighed merrily, "She is…for now." Motioning to her own shoulders, Regina's look turned coy and she pushed forward and grabbed Emma's hips. She licked her lips and pressed her nose against Emma's. "I think it's time your little Lucy had a turn."

"You mean?" Emma felt her heart speed up as Regina seductively stroked along her hips and palmed her ass cheeks.

"Yes, dear, I did make a promise earlier…so let's have Lucy take a seat on the throne."

She didn't wait to be asked twice, surging forward, her knees slid along the table, knocking stray sex toys over as she positioned Lucy over Regina's waiting face. Regina wasted no time with teasing; Lucy was already more than ready. She pushed her face up and pulled Lucy down, greedily taking her. Emma fell forward, propping her elbows on the table, her breasts hanging vertical as her senses were assaulted by the feeling of Regina's probing tongue and lips smacking and lapping at her.

A spike of Adrenaline coursed through her, from the urgency of her need. Emma cursed breathlessly, as Regina locked her arms over her ass and pulled her full weight onto her face, letting Emma grind wantonly against her mouth. She angled herself just right, getting the delicious contact in the perfect spot where she needed it.

Spurred on by the blonde's ambition and gusto, Regina happily feasted on her arousal, running her tongue in swirls and patterns, messily and noisily pleasuring her without care for how she looked or sounded. She hummed, wanting more and unable to get enough of the woman who was erratically moving above her, driving her on like a final sprint to the finish line of a race.

Emma groaned: her voice rang out deep and pitchy, as she pressed down a final time. She announced she was cumming loud enough that the word echoed in the otherwise quiet dining room. The pressure built until she couldn't take anymore. She held her breath and ground her teeth as she exploded in a blinding orgasm, her hips rotating like a chugging locomotive.

Licking soundly over a very sensitive Lucy, Regina moved her head and kissed Emma's heaving stomach, pulling her jelly like body back down and holding her tightly as she slowly recovered from the experience. She smoothed back, Emma's hair from her sweaty temples, very pleased with her handiwork. Emma's cheeks were red, and her jaw was slack, her mouth open as she sucked in ragged breaths. Emma bowed her chin and kissed the daylights out of Regina in gratitude, "That was so good. You have no idea…uhhh."

"Oh, I do know," Regina took her index finger and booped the tip of Emma's nose as if she was an innocent child with so much to learn. Magic sex was great, magic sex with toys was awesome, but Regina loved the fact that they didn't even need the extra smoke and mirrors to have the most incredible sex. It was just their energies and chemistry combining in an orgasmic rush that left her body thrumming and drained and ever hungrier and increasingly excited.

"Where did our two-headed friend roll off to? I'm not letting you get out of your next magic lesson just because you are looking a bit…spent," Regina kissed her forehead and patted her back as Emma slowly rolled off of her, still not entirely back to reality.

Emma put her limp hands down and pushed herself up with a grunt, as she looked around the floor for the two-headed dragon, "Hmm-mmm, Lucy will nobly slay the dragon for Her Majesty, just give me a minute."


End file.
